A VERY-ill-advised text-based adventure

[Iprobablysuck]

Try to convince Cherry Dog's family that i'm not robbing them.

[Annadog40]

Say "That's what you get for attacking me!" while gently pushing Ircher out of the house and shutting the door behind him. Then practice my knife skills on a resurrected Kappy.

[McMenno]

Try to beckon Elekitu to our location using the teapot song communication network (tm)

[Randomnamechange]

punch felissan in the face until he is out cold

[Kublai Khan]

Co-ordinate attack on "Felissan" with "randommidget". Sharing the goal to render "Felissan" unconscious.

[Ircher]

Someone go attack Annadog who's being a bully

[ConManMick]

I close my eyes, and sit on the ground, far enough from the pub that they won't see me. I focus on the teapot song, emptying everyrhing else from my mind. Then, I begin to chant it at a very low frequency, so it travels well. I would like to impart to all who have sang, cried, hummed etc. That McMenno and I are on to a sure thing and they should come join us via the well.

McMenno if this works we're gonna have a new life at sea it's gonna be rad

[KingdomAces]

Scope out the Castle's defenses.

And also get my pet bird to attack Annadog.

[KuroiXHF]

I ask the old man to direct me to the nearest village, full of buxom women. If needed, I can offer amazing tales of heroics as payment.

[itlepip]

give soup to cheery family and punch I probably suck.

[Iprobablysuck]

Duck the punch and kick itlepip in the family jewels

[Annadog40]

Defend myself with knife once (or if) bird arrives otherwise continue with current action.

[KingdomAces]

Probably because you ate a guy. Seriously, I was trying to be merciful.

[Cheery Dog]

G take soup back to fire place.

Explain to family that these were fellow inmates.

[Killthestory]

find the nearest person to me and boop them

[Ircher]

Open the door and attack Annadog again (when the bird arrives if it arrives).

(And if I die, my final will is that the divine may seek vengeance against Annadog's wicked actions.)

[McMenno]

maybe we can recruit you as a ghost

[Annadog40]

You know, you could of gone off and looked for help in the teleporting well but instead you decided to attack me again. Stab Ircher if they enter again.

[CareyHammer]

Inventory

[Ircher]

maybe we can recruit you as a ghost

Only if you help me haunt Annadog!

[Klazam]

look around for a conveniently placed piece of siege weaponry

[ConManMick]

maybe we can recruit you as a ghost

Only if you help me haunt Annadog!

Idk dude we just cashed in on a one way ticket to freedom, seems like a bad idea to go back. Besides, once the dudes who joined the guards head back, I'm sure they're gonna mash everyone still at the starting point.

[Annadog40]

No need to waste your everlasting existence on me Ircher. Just go in the teleporting well and go to a healer or something. Then you can live it up at the pub. Got your whole life ahead of you.

[Ircher]

Vengeance, I seek vengeance on you.

[Aronis]

Try to cry the teapot song until I've learnt how to do it successfully

ACTION FAILED

Crying the teapot song is not something that can be learned with simple trial and error.

ENTER ACTION: __________

Try to beckon Elekitu to our location using the teapot song communication network (tm)

ACTION FAILED

It is very difficult to communicate using the teapot song network and something that cannot be accomplished with your weak level of concentration.

ENTER ACTION: __________

punch felissan in the face until he is out cold

Co-ordinate attack on "Felissan" with "randommidget". Sharing the goal to render "Felissan" unconscious.

RESULT

You both gang up on "Felissan" who seems uninterested in defending himself. As a result you easily render "Felissan" unconscious.

ENTER ACTION: __________

I close my eyes, and sit on the ground, far enough from the pub that they won't see me. I focus on the teapot song, emptying everyrhing else from my mind. Then, I begin to chant it at a very low frequency, so it travels well. I would like to impart to all who have sang, cried, hummed etc. That McMenno and I are on to a sure thing and they should come join us via the well.

McMenno if this works we're gonna have a new life at sea it's gonna be rad

ACTION FAILED

You close your eyes and sit on the ground clearing everything from your mind. You begin to chant the song at a low frequency so it will travel better. Unfortunately you struggle to connect with everyone, the challenge of contacting everyone overwhelms you. You might have more success if you focus on messaging a single target.

ENTER ACTION: __________

Scope out the Castle's defenses.

And also get my pet bird to attack Annadog.

ACTION FAILED

The castle is not particularly large or imposing compared to what you might expect, but it still poses quite the challenge to a two-man army. It has a moat though and a drawbridge which is currently raised. Not to mention a lookout tower that would spot you coming well in advance of your arrival assuming they have not already seen you. Getting inside will be quite difficult without help from inside.

You do not possess a pet bird.

ENTER ACTION: __________

I ask the old man to direct me to the nearest village, full of buxom women. If needed, I can offer amazing tales of heroics as payment.

RESULT

The man slams the door in your face, clearly uninterested in helping you.

ENTER ACTION: __________

give soup to cheery family and punch I probably suck.

RESULT

You hand the soup to "Cheery Dog," then turn around and punch "Iprobablysuck" in the face.

ENTER ACTION: __________

Try to convince Cherry Dog's family that i'm not robbing them.

Duck the punch and kick itlepip in the family jewels

ACTION FAILED

You try to convince the family that you are not robbing them which seems to work. Unfortunately while doing so you get punched in the face by "itlepip" which causes no real harm, but stuns you enough to cause your kick to miss.

ENTER ACTION: __________

G take soup back to fire place.

Explain to family that these were fellow inmates.

ACTION FAILED

You take the soup back over to the fireplace while explaining to your family that "itlepip" and "Iprobablysuck" were inmates with you. Your family has no issues understanding why they got locked up, but they seem nervous about them being here though. It is probably a result of their behavior at the moment.

ENTER ACTION: __________

find the nearest person to me and boop them

RESULT

You boop "Annadog40," who is currently distracted by "Ircher" and an imaginary bird.

ENTER ACTION: __________

Scream an agonizingly high pitched scream at Annadog. Then search for a dictor while yelling for help.

(And that isn't cool at all, @Annadog)

Open the door and attack Annadog again (when the bird arrives if it arrives).

(And if I die, my final will is that the divine may seek vengeance against Annadog's wicked actions.)

RESULT

You scream in agony and start to search for a doctor for a minute. But then when you get premonitions about a bird arriving to help you attack "Annadog40," you decide to go near the door waiting for the bird to show up so you can attack "Annadog40." The bird has not shown up yet.

ENTER ACTION: __________

Say "That's what you get for attacking me!" while gently pushing Ircher out of the house and shutting the door behind him. Then practice my knife skills on a resurrected Kappy.

Defend myself with knife once (or if) bird arrives otherwise continue with current action.

You know, you could of gone off and looked for help in the teleporting well but instead you decided to attack me again. Stab Ircher if they enter again.

RESULT

You yell at "Ircher" shutting the door to the house. You anxiously wait by the door, prepared to attack him and the bird if they enter.

ENTER ACTION: __________

Inventory

RESULT

You do not have anything in your inventory at the moment.

ENTER ACTION: __________

look around for a conveniently placed piece of siege weaponry

RESULT

You look around for siege weaponry, but do not find anything.

ENTER ACTION: __________