Worst role ideas?

[pete d]

Delusional Mercenary

: Role PM as per normal mercenary; mod notes: actually town-aligned; regardless of the alignment of the player they target, they will be told that they are now a two-person mafia group with their target. They are allowed to communicate with their target at night.

[Mirth]

Were-Hamster:

player with a post restriction such that he or she cannot post anything but the hamster dance song. (You know, "dee dee dee pa did did doo doo, dee pa did did doo"). Cannot vote. At night they *must* bite another player, who will then also get the posting restriction. Wins when everyone is a singing/dancing hamster. (If a killing role is hit with this, the killing role can still kill, but kills will only be effective against non-hamsters. All other roles becomes powerless.)

[Oman]

(building off of Nab's)

You are

Indifferent

: you must... aw who really cares what you're suppose to do?

So full of win.

[Adel]

Red State American

: With a beer in one hand and a Bible in the other you blame people who are different from you for the evil in the world. Each night your government will kidnap and deport one player of your choice for "questioning". His body will be found in the morning, and his alignment will always be reported as "scum". PM me your choice before each Night's deadline, or else

you

will be the one targeted. 'cause you are either with us or you are against us. You win if you survive since you don't care about anyone else in the world. You have a vote, but you never really use it, even though you may say that you do.

[Snix]

You are the

hippie

your job is to get high, to talk about peace, and keep everyone from lynching you. Each day you must somehow allude to the fact that you are high, (you will be graded on this and receive style points based on it) you must also never be voting for someone who is lynched. If you die, it's game over man. IF you are recruited into a cult you get bonus style points and gain a bonus ability.

(If in cult only) the hippie may poison the fruit punch to show the superiority of his cult. Everyone with a vote on them dies and the town lapses into night.)

[Oman]

Red State American

: With a beer in one hand and a Bible in the other you blame people who are different from you for the evil in the world. Each night your government will kidnap and deport one player of your choice for "questioning". His body will be found in the morning, and his alignment will always be reported as "scum". PM me your choice before each Night's deadline, or else

you

will be the one targeted. 'cause you are either with us or you are against us. You win if you survive since you don't care about anyone else in the world. You have a vote, but you never really use it, even though you may say that you do.

This role is awesome, Adel's political bias makes me happy for once!

[Mirth]

Red State American

: With a beer in one hand and a Bible in the other you blame people who are different from you for the evil in the world. Each night your government will kidnap and deport one player of your choice for "questioning". His body will be found in the morning, and his alignment will always be reported as "scum". PM me your choice before each Night's deadline, or else

you

will be the one targeted. 'cause you are either with us or you are against us. You win if you survive since you don't care about anyone else in the world. You have a vote, but you never really use it, even though you may say that you do.

I'm sorry, but having been raised by Republicans (I'm not one myself), I can't help but counter:

Congratulations! You are a

Bleeding-Heart Pinko Commie Liberal!

You will not be happy until everyone conforms to your ideal collectivist state and runs around hugging trees and eating nothing but soy products. Since you're a pacificist, PETA member, and a believer in a strong centralized government that makes it unneccessary for people to do anything for themselves, you want all guns to be destroyed. As such, your very existance blocks all actions by all protown players carrying guns (cops, vigilantes, FBI agents, etc), but, since the Mafia can always get their weapons illegally, they can still kill unrestrained. In fact, with not pesky cops roaming around and investigating them, they can kill up to three times a night as long as your alive. Your power also doesn't effect Serial Killers as they murder with other forms of weapons (you know, like choaking people with wads of recylced paper or driving over them with energy efficient cars.) During the day you must make at least 10 references to Birenstocks, NPR, and Tofu, or your failure to inspire social awareness will give the SK an additional night kill. Oh, and you're a Survivor. Good luck!]

Apologies to most liberals out there.

[Oman]

Dear god, we need a fundamentalist mafia with some of these roles.

[Mirth]

What, you mean like my polygamous lover idea where its rigged so that everyone somehow dies?

[Oman]

No, more like extreeme roles with fun Incharacter PRs

[Mirth]

Could you give an example? (I dont sleep much, my mind doesn't work.)

[Oman]

Umm...sort of less gamebreaking versions of yours and Adel's roles. Things that require posts to be somewhat in character and will almost definatly orchestrate a fight between them.

[gorckat]

You are

The Avatar:

All your posts must be a GIF or PNG image file not larger than 100x100 or 30KB. Posts may be animated. You may not use fonts in the creation of your images- buy a tablet or use the mouse to write words.

[Yosarian2]

You are the

Bidding Bridge Player

! You won the opening bid, so now you've got to play! Your partner, the Bidding Bridge Player's Partner (or the Dummy, however you like to refer to him/her), is waiting for you to make his move for him. You may PM your partner at anytime during the day, and then your partner must copy and paste that PM to the thread (being the Dummy, it is the only way your partner can participate in the game). Your partner, however, cannot PM you at all. You win with the town IF you and your partner survive. If one of you is lynched or killed, the other is eliminated as well.

You are the

Bidding Bridge Player's Partner

, commonly refered to as the

Dummy

. Good news: Your partner, the Bidding Bridge Player, won the bid! Bad news: You're now the dummy! You have no night abilities, you may not talk to your partner at all, and you cannot post anything else except for the PMs your partner sends you (Copy and paste the

entire PM

, except for the heading and title). You win with the town IF you and your partner survive. If one of you is lynched or killed, the other is eliminated as well.

That's a pretty funny idea, but why make the dummy a seperate player at all if he can't do anything? Why not just made a mod alt and have the Bridge Player play both roles? (And, of course, make SURE the list mod knows this is going on so he knows there's no cheating going on here).

[Rime Ice Fury]

That's a pretty funny idea, but why make the dummy a seperate player at all if he can't do anything? Why not just made a mod alt and have the Bridge Player play both roles? (And, of course, make SURE the list mod knows this is going on so he knows there's no cheating going on here).

Mainly because it IS the "worst roles ever" thread.

But your idea of a mod alt for the Dummy would make this idea playable. It would be perfect in a "Blind Mafia" setup (every player uses an alt so they can't metagame anyone).

And as for political bias:

You are the

Individualist Anarchist Libertarian

. You can't stand Republican fascists, you hate Democrat socialists, and you are irritated by compromising, gridlock-happy centrists. You also can't stand democracy, as it's all about everyone stealing from everyone else by process of the vote. As such, you cannot vote,

ever

; it's a modkillable offense to go against your well-developed principles like that. However, you follow justice, albeit on your own terms. Whenever a townie or neutral not opposed to the town is lynched, you may on that night target and kill any single player who had a vote on the lynched player at the end of that day (you're against government; of course you're well-armed!). You may hate the townies, but you loathe murderous scum even more. You win when all scum are eliminated.

Feel free to post about your hatred of "the system" and the ballot. Feel free to tell everyone that you absolutely refuse to vote; after all, you are not one to hide your beliefs. However, it must be done in character, and

under no circumstances can you quote your PM

. For example, you may say "I am an individualist anarchist libertarian, and thus, am principally opposed to voting", but you cannot say "my role says I'm not allowed to vote or else I'll get modkilled."

Do note that your opposition to democracy comes at a price: Assuming you are alive, if the day breaks with the number of mafia being exactly one less than the number of non-mafia players, you and the town lose because your refusal to vote prevents the mafia from being lynched.

EDIT:

Mod's note for the role: All cop investigations come up "guilty" on the Individualist Anarchist Libertarian, due to his refusal to acknowledge the law as legitimate and due to his vigilante attitude toward justice.

[Mirth]

But that one really isn't so bad. I totally wouldn't mind playing it (then again, I fall pretty close to Libertarian politically, so I might be biased.)

I'll do you one worse though:

Congratulations! You are a

Schizophrenic Conspiracy Theorist Living in Your Mother's Basement.

You can't trust anybody because you know the government installed those microchips in your teeth and the aliens would be reading your mind if it wasn't for your trusty tin foil helmet that you insist on wearing even in the shower. Your neighbors are also spying on you, what with always trying to talk to you on the rare occasions you encounter day light. If you go too far away from home, you just know that they, and the Swedish Mafia will do mean evil nasty horrible things to you. Things probably involving goldfish and xylophones...but you need to keep on living and spread word of all these atrocities through your underground e-Zine on your hacker-proof connection internet connection. As such you win only if you are the last person left alive. You are, however, not allowed to vote for anyone so the government can't track you, but since you know all your neighbors are evil, each of your posts must be accusatory to the person who posted before you. These accusations must not at all be steeped in reality, and the Mod requires that you include at least one obscure conspiracy theory reference every 24 hours or you will be modkilled. And remember, you need to be the last person alive. Good luck!

[Rime Ice Fury]

But that one really isn't so bad. I totally wouldn't mind playing it (then again, I fall pretty close to Libertarian politically, so I might be biased.)

That's the problem. I made a role that coincides with my political beliefs. It's kind of hard to mock it from my point of view (except for giving the role a critical weakness that could very well cripple the town).

Actually, I'm going to edit to add one more quirk to it.

[Mirth]

Eh. On that note:

You are

Jesse Ventura

and by extension purely awesome. You can do whatever the heck you want. Seriously. Night kill, double vote, heal, whatever, just send a PM to the mod and consider it done. You want the people to see the light and get their heads out of their behinds, so you win when all the mafia and other politicians are dead. Unfortunatly, most of the world doesn't take you very seriously, (probably has to do with that wrestling thing), so cop investigations will turn you up as guilty, so be careful. You'll also get modkilled if you roleclaim. (You are allowed to roleclaim as anything else other than yourself.)

Mod note: There will be at least one player who is out to get this person lynched at all costs. Also, even if town wins and this person is alive at endgame, he might still lose if there are other pro-town politicians alive.

[Streeflo]

Let's beat a long-dead horse into a bloody pulp.

You are

Dick Cheney

.
You have a one-shot daykill that you must use on Day 1. If you do not use your daykill, you lose the game immediately and are modkilled. You must claim immediately after your daykill that it was a complete accident, your fingers slipped, and you thought your victim was a quail. Your target will immediately die by being "peppered" in the face, and the day will not end.
You win with the town.


You are an

Annoying Paparazzi

.
If at any time during the game a daykill occurs, you must harass and hassle whoever performed the daykill until either
1. They die.
2. You die.
3. They decide to quit the game and ask for a replacement. If this happens, you instantly win the game.

Second win condition: None.

[xyzzy]

Flavorless player

You will win if you never let on to the idea that you're playing a game - namely, that you never use any flavor like "cop", "scum", "townie", "nightkill", or anything that suggests that you are not part of a completely abstract strategy contest to determine who is best at lying or catching liars.

[Mirth]

My last bit of horror for the night:

You are a

Catholic Priest

, and boy, when you signed up for this gig you didn't know how hard this celibacy thing was. Sure, spreading the word of God is important and all, but you just can't keep your eyes off that new alter boy. Every night, you have a difficult choice to make. You can either spread the word of your good lord Jesus Christ by sending in three names, such that one of them will randomly become a Christian (you will not be told which one) or send in a target that you want to molest. Now then, both of these choices have repricussions. If you choose to act as a missionary, you will lose the privelege of talking the next day (all that sermonizing will make your throat soar) and also, if your random convert hits a player that is already a Christian, he or she will have a 50% chance of losing their faith because they're sick of listening to your preach hellfire. You will not be informed of this, but any subsequent re-convert attempts on them will only have a 50% chance of working. If you choose to molest, your victim will lose the ability to talk for the next day. Also, some of those altar boys know where daddy keeps the shotgun, so be careful. You win when everyone is a Christian, (including the dead players, because you really want their souls to go to heaven).

Mod Note: There will be one player who is a

Die-Hard Atheist

. If the Priest tries to convert this player, the conversion will fail and the Atheist will be told the Priest targetted him. If the Priest tries to molest this player, the molestation will also fail, and the Priest will need one vote less to be lynched on the following day. Also, if the molest option hits any player carrying a gun, there is a 25% chance that the priest will not survive the night, though the action will be valid.

Also, apologies to most Catholics.

[gameshark1313]

My last bit of horror for the night:

You are a

Catholic Priest

, and boy, when you signed up for this gig you didn't know how hard this celibacy thing was. Sure, spreading the word of God is important and all, but you just can't keep your eyes off that new alter boy. Every night, you have a difficult choice to make. You can either spread the word of your good lord Jesus Christ by sending in three names, such that one of them will randomly become a Christian (you will not be told which one) or send in a target that you want to molest. Now then, both of these choices have repricussions. If you choose to act as a missionary, you will lose the privelege of talking the next day (all that sermonizing will make your throat soar) and also, if your random convert hits a player that is already a Christian, he or she will have a 50% chance of losing their faith because they're sick of listening to your preach hellfire. You will not be informed of this, but any subsequent re-convert attempts on them will only have a 50% chance of working. If you choose to molest, your victim will lose the ability to talk for the next day. Also, some of those altar boys know where daddy keeps the shotgun, so be careful. You win when everyone is a Christian, (including the dead players, because you really want their souls to go to heaven).

Mod Note: There will be one player who is a

Die-Hard Atheist

. If the Priest tries to convert this player, the conversion will fail and the Atheist will be told the Priest targetted him. If the Priest tries to molest this player, the molestation will also fail, and the Priest will need one vote less to be lynched on the following day. Also, if the molest option hits any player carrying a gun, there is a 25% chance that the priest will not survive the night, though the action will be valid.

Also, apologies to most Catholics.

Its impossible for the Priest to win if there is a Die-Hard Athiest

[Cogito Ergo Sum]

Your point being?

[vollkan]

My last bit of horror for the night:

You are a Catholic Priest, and boy, when you signed up for this gig you didn't know how hard this celibacy thing was. Sure, spreading the word of God is important and all, but you just can't keep your eyes off that new alter boy. Every night, you have a difficult choice to make. You can either spread the word of your good lord Jesus Christ by sending in three names, such that one of them will randomly become a Christian (you will not be told which one) or send in a target that you want to molest. Now then, both of these choices have repricussions. If you choose to act as a missionary, you will lose the privelege of talking the next day (all that sermonizing will make your throat soar) and also, if your random convert hits a player that is already a Christian, he or she will have a 50% chance of losing their faith because they're sick of listening to your preach hellfire. You will not be informed of this, but any subsequent re-convert attempts on them will only have a 50% chance of working. If you choose to molest, your victim will lose the ability to talk for the next day. Also, some of those altar boys know where daddy keeps the shotgun, so be careful. You win when everyone is a Christian, (including the dead players, because you really want their souls to go to heaven).

Mod Note: There will be one player who is a Die-Hard Atheist. If the Priest tries to convert this player, the conversion will fail and the Atheist will be told the Priest targetted him. If the Priest tries to molest this player, the molestation will also fail, and the Priest will need one vote less to be lynched on the following day. Also, if the molest option hits any player carrying a gun, there is a 25% chance that the priest will not survive the night, though the action will be valid.

Also, apologies to most Catholics.

As a die-hard atheist myself, this had me laughing.

Maybe you could make a "Northern Ireland" themed game and have an Anglican faction as well?

[Oman]

My last bit of horror for the night:

You are a

Catholic Priest

, and boy, when you signed up for this gig you didn't know how hard this celibacy thing was. Sure, spreading the word of God is important and all, but you just can't keep your eyes off that new alter boy. Every night, you have a difficult choice to make. You can either spread the word of your good lord Jesus Christ by sending in three names, such that one of them will randomly become a Christian (you will not be told which one) or send in a target that you want to molest. Now then, both of these choices have repricussions. If you choose to act as a missionary, you will lose the privelege of talking the next day (all that sermonizing will make your throat soar) and also, if your random convert hits a player that is already a Christian, he or she will have a 50% chance of losing their faith because they're sick of listening to your preach hellfire. You will not be informed of this, but any subsequent re-convert attempts on them will only have a 50% chance of working. If you choose to molest, your victim will lose the ability to talk for the next day. Also, some of those altar boys know where daddy keeps the shotgun, so be careful. You win when everyone is a Christian, (including the dead players, because you really want their souls to go to heaven).

Mod Note: There will be one player who is a

Die-Hard Atheist

. If the Priest tries to convert this player, the conversion will fail and the Atheist will be told the Priest targetted him. If the Priest tries to molest this player, the molestation will also fail, and the Priest will need one vote less to be lynched on the following day. Also, if the molest option hits any player carrying a gun, there is a 25% chance that the priest will not survive the night, though the action will be valid.

Also, apologies to most Catholics.

This really fits in as a bad role...overcomplex, crazy, and completely broken. Well done!