Mini 942: Gonzo Mafia - Game Over!

[VP Baltar]

Mini 942: Gonzo Mafia

"Balls," I said. "Never mind the track. The track is for punks. We are Road People. We are Cafe Racers."

The Cafe Racer is a different breed, and we have our own situations. Pure speed in sixth gear on a 5000-foot straightaway is one thing, but pure speed in third gear on a gravel-strewn downhill ess-turn is quite another.
But we like it. A thoroughbred Cafe Racer will ride all night through a fog storm in freeway traffic to put himself into what somebody told him was the ugliest and tightest decreasing-radius turn since Genghis Khan invented the corkscrew.

Cafe Racing is mainly a matter of taste. It is an atavistic mentality, a peculiar mix of low style, high speed, pure dumbness, and overweening commitment to the Cafe Life and all its dangerous pleasures... I am a Cafe Racer myself, on some days - and it is one of my finest addictions.

I am not without scars on my brain and my body, but I can live with them. I still feel a shudder in my spine every time I see a picture of a Vincent Black Shadow, or when I walk into a public restroom and hear crippled men whispering about the terrifying Kawasaki Triple... I have visions of compound femur-fractures and large black men in white hospital suits holding me down on a gurney while a nurse called "Bess" sews the flaps of my scalp together with a stitching drill.

Ho, ho. Thank God for these flashbacks.

~Song of the Sausage Creature

---

Welcome to Gonzo Mafia, you whimpering little jellyfish. You’ve been running around here for far too long like the man in the gray flannel suit trying to catch his morning train, and it’s a damn bore. It’s a bore to me, and it is more certainly a drag for the agents of The Fear. Sure, there used to be a time when they were complacent to sink their claws in you and bat you around like so many other mutilated rodents, but that was then. This is now, buddy boy. Now is the time of gnashing teeth and rending flesh and grinding your bones into manageable pieces that can easily pass when they shit you out the other end.

So, what are you going to do? Are you going to lie down on the field of battle and wait for the enemy to pass, or are you going to get up and show you actually have some kind of reason for being alive? Are you a punk or a are you a Café Racer?

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Bought the ticket...

Sotty7 survived and wins! As do Jahudo and Cobalt.

...but no longer taking the ride.

Cobalt

replaces ortolan Day 1

,

Richard M. Nixon (Mafia Neighbor Maker)

, lynched Day 1
Jahudo

replaces kyle99 Day 1, who replaced charter pre-game

,

Ralph Steadman (Mafia Goon)

, lynched Day 2
Percy,

Whimpering Slave of the Fear (Vanilla Townie)

, killed Night 2
ekiM,

Whimpering Slave of the Fear (Vanilla Townie)

, lynched Day3
Jack

replaces flinter Day 1

,

Raoul Duke (Freak Power Neighbor Maker)

, killed Night 3
hohum,

Whimpering Slave of the Fear (Vanilla Townie)

, lynched Day 4
Zachrulez,

Mr. Tambourine Man (Pied Piper)

, killed Night 4
xRECKONERx,

Whimpering Slave of the Fear (Vanilla Townie)

, lynched Day 5
Vi,

Whimpering Slave of the Fear (Vanilla Townie)

, killed Night 5
Amished

replaces Locke Lamora Day 2

,

Ralph 'Sonny' Barger (Paranoid Gun Owner)

, lynched Day 6
Debonair Danny DiPietro,

Jean-Claude Killy (Cowardly Hider)

, killed Night 6

[VP Baltar]

The Rules

General Rules

1) Days will have a preset deadline of two (2) weeks. Under extraneous circumstances this may be open to extension, but it is unlikely and I would not count on it happening.

2) All votes and unvotes must be done in bold to count. An example would be:

Unvote, Vote: VP Baltar

. You may also

Vote: No Lynch

if you please. Unvotes are required.

3) A lynch will be reached when a majority of players (one-half of the living players plus one, fractions rounded down) vote for a specific player. When a lynch is reached, the day will enter twilight and no more votes or unvotes shall be counted.

4) If a day ends at the full deadline and a majority has not been reached, no lynch will take place.

5) Nights will have a set deadline of 72 hours. Any night actions not sent in by that time will not be counted. No exceptions.

6) This is a game, so have fun and play to win. However, if I feel you are making unnecessary personal attacks and/or derogatory statements on any basis against another player, I reserve the right to replace and/or modkill you at my discretion. Use common sense so I don’t have to get medieval on you.

7) Any and all requests or questions to the mod must be made in

bold

if you want to be certain you will receive a reply. PMs are also an acceptable format for queries.

8) Any and all flavor used in this game is present solely for the purpose of entertainment and does not give insight in any way into the setup of this game. This includes Role PMs.

Activity Rules

9) You must post in this thread every 72 hours or you will be prodded with extreme prejudice. If you do not respond to a prod within 24 hours you may be replaced.

10) If you are prodded more than three times during this game you may be replaced.

11) If someone has not been active for 72 hours and I have not posted in the thread that s/he will be prodded, feel free to give me a friendly reminder in bold to get out the prod stick.

12) If you are going to be away from the thread for more than 72 hours, please make it known with a bolded V/LA post.

Gameplay Rules

13) Do not delete or edit any of your posts. If I discover you are doing this, you will be modkilled. No exceptions, so don’t do it.

14) Do not use invisible or hidden text in your posts. Doing so will result in you being replaced or modkilled, depending on the severity of the offense.

15) Do not directly quote or pretend to quote any PM to or from the mod.

16) If you have been lynched, you are dead. You are not allowed to post in the thread any more until the game is over. This includes ‘Bah!’ posts. Violation of this rule may result in repercussions against your faction.

17) Do not discuss ongoing games in this thread. Violation of this rule may result in anything from a warning to replacement and/or modkill.

18) Do not discuss this game ANYWHERE outside of this thread until it is completed, unless your role PM specifies an area that you are allowed to do so. If I find out you have been doing so, you will be modkilled.

19) I will be using

this font

during this game. Do not use it.

You are a

Whimpering Slave of The Fear,

Vanilla Townie

. You are afraid of living your life with any sort of passion or sense of risk. Therefore, you have no special abilities and will probably die with a great deal of regret. Pathetic.

• During the day, you may use your vote to help eliminate threats to the town.
  
• You win when all threats to the town are eliminated.

The game can be found here:

[VP Baltar]

All role PMs have been randomly distributed. Once nine players have confirmed in thread, Day 1 shall begin.

[VP Baltar]

charter needs to be replaced. Searching now. I'm hoping to have the spot filled before the game starts. Day 1 will still begin when nine players confirm.

[VP Baltar]

kyle99 replaces charter effective immediately. Thanks, kyle99!

[VP Baltar]

Nine players have confirmed and it is now Day 1. Deadline is 14 days from this post.

Mod:

"16) If you have been lynched, you are dead. You are not allowed to post in the thread any more until the game is over. This includes ‘Bah!’ posts. Violation of this rule may result in repercussions against your faction."

Does this mean after enough votes have been reached, or after you've announced the lynch?

Sorry, you may post until I post the lynch scene and lock the thread. No Bah posts the next day, however.

[VP Baltar]

I wandered into a library last week and decided to do a quick bit of reading on The Law, which has caused me some troubles recently. It was a cold, mean day, and my mood was not much different. The library was empty at that hour of the morning....It was closed, in fact, but not locked. So I went in.

Far up at the top of the long stone staircase I could see a small man gesturing at me: waving at me, shouting....But his voice sounded crazy and scattered, like the screeching of a cat or the sound of beer bottles exploding in a garbage compactor. The only words I could hear were

OUT

and

NIGHT

.

Vote Count 1-1

:

xRECKONERx ~ L-4 (hohum, Debonair Danny DiPietro, kyle99)

Debonair Danny DiPietro ~ L-6 (xRECKONERx)
Locke Lamora ~ L-6 (Zachrulez)
Percy ~ L-6 (Sotty7)
ekiM ~ L-6 (Locke Lamora)
flinter ~ L-6 (Percy)

Not Voting: ortolan, Vi, flinter, ekiM

With

12

alive, it takes

7

to lynch. Deadline is March 31 at roughly 3 p.m. (GMT -4).

[VP Baltar]

When I got about halfway up the stairs I stopped and raised both hands. "Don't worry!" I shouted. "Police!"

He shuddered and fell back, saying nothing. His eyes were huge and a shudder ran through his body as I approached. "No problem," I said to him. "Just routine police work." I flashed my gold

Special DEA Agent

badge at him, then reached out to shake hands, but he moaned suddenly and leaped away...and as he collapsed awkwardly on the cold marble floor I saw that his left ankle was encircled by a heavy steel band that was strapped to a black box.

---

Vote Count 1-2

:

xRECKONERx ~ L-3 (hohum, Debonair Danny DiPietro, kyle99, ekiM)

ekiM ~ L-5 (Locke Lamora, ortolan)
Locke Lamora ~ L-6 (Zachrulez)
Percy ~ L-6 (Sotty7)
flinter ~ L-6 (Percy)
Zachrulez ~ L-6 (Vi)
kyle 99 ~ L-6 (xRECKONERx)

Not Voting: flinter

With

12

alive, it takes

7

to lynch. Deadline is March 31 at roughly 3 p.m. (GMT -4).

[VP Baltar]

"What the fuck is

that

thing?" I asked him, reaching down to help him up. But he scuttled away again; and then he hissed at me.

"

You

know what it is!" he whimpered. "You filthy murdering

pig

!"

"What?" I said. "Are you crazy?" Then I jumped down on him and grabbed his foot so I could bring him a little closer. He uttered another sharp, terrified cry as I slid him across the smooth floor and pulled his ankle up to where it was right in front of my eyes.

---

Vote Count 1-3

:

xRECKONERx ~ L-3 (hohum, Debonair Danny DiPietro, kyle99, ekiM)

ekiM ~ L-5 (Locke Lamora, ortolan)
flinter ~ L-5 (Percy, Zachrulez)
Zachrulez ~ L-6 (Vi)
kyle 99 ~ L-6 (xRECKONERx)
hohum ~ L-6 (Sotty7)

Not Voting: flinter

With

12

alive, it takes

7

to lynch. Deadline is March 31 at roughly 3 p.m. (GMT -4).

[VP Baltar]

"Be quiet," I said. "I want a look at this thing in good light." He struggled briefly, but I quickly stepped over his leg and hyper-extended his knee until he went rigid, then I braced him and examined the box. It was a standard-issue Body Beeper with a lock-on ankle bracelet--one of the New Age tools now available to law enforcement agencies everywhere, for purposes of electronic House Arrest for those who have been brought

within The System

, but for whom there is no room in the overcrowded jails, pens, and prisons. The United States of America has more people locked up than any other country in the world, including Cuba and South Africa.

---

Vote Count 1-4

:

xRECKONERx ~ L-3 (hohum, Debonair Danny DiPietro, kyle99, ekiM)

ekiM ~ L-4 (Locke Lamora, ortolan, Vi)
flinter ~ L-5 (Percy, Zachrulez)
hohum ~ L-6 (Sotty7)
Sotty7 ~ L-6 (xRECKONERx)

Not Voting: flinter

With

12

alive, it takes

7

to lynch. Deadline is March 31 at roughly 3 p.m. (GMT -4).

[VP Baltar]

Our prison system from coast to coast is bulging at the seams, and hundreds more are being crammed in every day--more and more of them saddled with the

mandatory Sentences

and

No Parole

Provisions that came in with the first Reagan Administration, which began only ten years ago, but it seems like twenty or thirty.

Indeed. But that is another very long story and we will save it for later....So let's get back to the library and my new buddy, the unfortunate Prisoner that I seized and captured by accident at four o'clock in the morning when I caught him wandering aimlessly through the hallways of a massive public building with his eyes bulged out and his spine like rubber and probably his nuts on fire, too, because he had nothing to say for himself and no excuse for anything.

---

Vote Count 1-5

:

xRECKONERx ~ L-4 (hohum, Debonair Danny DiPietro, ekiM)

flinter ~ L-4 (Percy, Zachrulez, ortolan)
ekiM ~ L-5 (Locke Lamora, Vi)
hohum ~ L-6 (Sotty7)
Sotty7 ~ L-6 (xRECKONERx)
kyle99 ~ L-6 (flinter)

Not Voting: kyle99

With

12

alive, it takes

7

to lynch. Deadline is March 31 at roughly 3 p.m. (GMT -4).

[VP Baltar]

He was a loser. A wimp full of fear with no pride and sure as hell no Money....But I let him go anyway, and we talked for a while in the Men's Room about his problem. We were both nervous, so I went out to the car and got a bag of warm beers, along with a wooden pipe about half-full of good marijuana.

Soon we were both in a better mood, and I told him I was not really the Police, but just another good old boy with a yen to Read Law for a while and a few hours to spare before my next court appearance.

---

Vote Count 1-6

:

flinter ~ L-2 (Percy, Zachrulez, ortolan, Debonair Danny DiPietro, kyle99)

Percy ~ L-5 (Vi, hohum)
kyle99 ~ L-5 (flinter, ekiM)
Sotty7 ~ L-5 (xRECKONERx, Locke Lamora)
Locke Lamora ~ L-6 (Sotty7)

Not Voting:

With

12

alive, it takes

7

to lynch. Deadline is March 31 at roughly 3 p.m. (GMT -4).

[VP Baltar]

He was a first-time offender from Phoenix, serving work-release time in the Library on a six-year Attempted Rape charge that happened when he wandered into the Ladies' Room at the airport and got in a fight with two Mexican women who said they were paid police informants and turned him in as a Sex Offender when the airport police finally ran him down in a false doorway at the far end of the Lost Luggage hangar and dragged him away in handcuffs to the Red Carpet Club where they subjected him to a loud and humiliating Strip Search and beat him on the kidneys with iron gloves.

---

Vote Count 1-7

:

flinter ~ L-3 (Zachrulez, ortolan, Debonair Danny DiPietro, kyle99)

Percy ~ L-5 (Vi, hohum)
kyle99 ~ L-5 (flinter, ekiM)
Sotty7 ~ L-5 (xRECKONERx, Locke Lamora)
Locke Lamora ~ L-6 (Sotty7)
xRECKONERx ~ L-6 (Percy)

Not Voting:

With

12

alive, it takes

7

to lynch. Deadline is March 31 at roughly 3 p.m. (GMT -4).

[VP Baltar]

He was innocent, he said, but it made no difference....When they finally got him to jail he was charged with nine felonies including Aggravated Assault on a Police Officer, Gross Sexual Imposition, and Possession of 2,000 Marijuana Seeds that fell out of the lining of a suitcase he had borrowed from his son, for the trip.

That night he was beaten severely in the holding cell by a gang of sodomites who took all his cigarettes and then kicked him into a coma.

After thirty-three days in the jail hospital, he was assigned to a public defender who laughed at his case and called him "shiteyes" and said it was all a matter of money.

---

Vote Count 1-8

:

xRECKONERx ~ L-4 (Percy, Vi, Debonair Danny DiPietro)

flinter ~ L-5 (Zachrulez, kyle99)
Sotty7 ~ L-5 (xRECKONERx, Locke Lamora)
kyle99 ~ L-6 (ekiM)
Percy ~ L-6 (hohum)
Locke Lamora ~ L-6 (Sotty7)
hohum ~ L-6 (ortolan)
Zachrulez ~ L-6 (flinter)

Not Voting:

With

12

alive, it takes

7

to lynch. Deadline is March 31 at roughly 3 p.m. (GMT -4).

Locke Lamora's possible V/LA until Monday has been noted.

[VP Baltar]

Please note, in my haste to get this game up I forgot to copy the sample role PM into the rules. It is now present for those who wish to see it. My apologies.

[VP Baltar]

Ten weeks later, he was assigned to another lawyer who said he had no choice but to plead guilty and take his medicine like a man.

"I was lucky," he said. "I almost got sixteen years." He grinned happily and stared into my eyes.

"As it is now, I'll only have to do five."

---

Vote Count 1-9

:

xRECKONERx ~ L-4 (Vi, Debonair Danny DiPietro, hohum)

flinter ~ L-4 (Zachrulez, kyle99, Sotty7)
Sotty7 ~ L-5 (xRECKONERx, Locke Lamora)
hohum ~ L-5 (ortolan, Percy)
kyle99 ~ L-6 (ekiM)
Zachrulez ~ L-6 (flinter)

Not Voting:

With

12

alive, it takes

7

to lynch. Deadline is March 31 at roughly 3 p.m. (GMT -4).

[VP Baltar]

flinter has requested replacement. I should have something arranged shortly.

--edit--

Jack replaces flinter effective immediately. Welcome him!

[VP Baltar]

He was broken; a niggardly shell of a man, so afraid of the Law and the Cops and the Courts that he felt lucky and grateful to be serving only five years instead of sixteen--even though he was innocent. But now, after two long years on his knees

within The System,

he no longer missed standing up.

It made me nervous, so I started pacing around in circles on the white tile floor and jabbering distractedly at him from time to time....I was thinking; my mind was running at top speed, scanning and sorting my options. They ranged all the way from Dumb and Dangerous to Crazy, Evil, and utterly wrong from the start.

---

Vote Count 1-10

:

xRECKONERx ~ L-3 (Vi, Debonair Danny DiPietro, hohum, ekiM)

Jack ~ L-4 (Zachrulez, kyle99, Sotty7)
Sotty7 ~ L-5 (xRECKONERx, Locke Lamora)
hohum ~ L-5 (ortolan, Percy)

Not Voting: Jack

With

12

alive, it takes

7

to lynch. Deadline is March 31 at roughly 3 p.m. (GMT -4).

[VP Baltar]

"Do you keep any whiskey in this place?"

I asked him.

"We need whiskey. My brain is getting hazy."

He stared at me for a moment. Then he smiled vaguely and stood up.

"Sure,"

he said.

"I think I can put my hands on a pint of Old Crow."

He chuckled.

"What the hell? I could use some whiskey, myself."

He slid down off the marble washbasin where he'd been sitting and shuffled out of the room. He moved quickly and almost gracefully, but the ugly black box on his ankle slowed him down and caused him to walk with a limp.

---

Vote Count 1-11

:

xRECKONERx ~ L-3 (Vi, Debonair Danny DiPietro, hohum, ekiM)

Jack ~ L-4 (Zachrulez, kyle99, Sotty7)
hohum ~ L-4 (ortolan, Percy, Jack)
Sotty7 ~ L-5 (xRECKONERx, Locke Lamora)

Not Voting:

With

12

alive, it takes

7

to lynch. Deadline is March 31 at roughly 3 p.m. (GMT -4).

[VP Baltar]

Jahudo replaces kyle99 effective immediately. Welcome him!

[VP Baltar]

I sat on my own basin and drank our last warm beer. What the hell am I doing here? I wondered. I am a Doctor of Journalism and a Man of The Cloth. Why am I slumped in a bathroom at the Public Library at four o' clock in the morning? Drinking whiskey and smoking marijuana with a soul-dead convict who might be taken back to jail at any moment?

"What's your name?"

I asked him as he returned with a half-finished pint of whiskey in a brown bag.

"Andrew,"

he said.

"They call me Andy."

"Okay, Andrew,"

I said.

"Give me that whiskey and stand back. We are on the brink. Yes, I have an idea."

---

Vote Count 1-12

:

xRECKONERx ~ L-4 (Debonair Danny DiPietro, hohum, ekiM)

Jack ~ L-4 (Zachrulez, Jahudo, Sotty7)
hohum ~ L-5 (Percy, Jack)
Sotty7 ~ L-5 (xRECKONERx, Locke Lamora)
Jahudo ~ L-5 (Vi, ortolan)

Not Voting:

With

12

alive, it takes

7

to lynch. Deadline is March 31 at roughly 3 p.m. (GMT -4).

[VP Baltar]

He tossed me the bottle and I drank deeply, then handed it back to him.

"Don't worry about having this stuff on your breath when they come for you,"

I said.

"I have a new electric toothbrush out in the car that will sterilize your whole thorax in ten seconds. I also have some very fine cocaine downstairs in the car, which you might want to use when your eyes start looking like they do now...."

I slapped him on the leg and hit the Old Crow again.

"Hot damn, Andrew!"

I barked at him.

"We are

warriors

. The time has come to

rumble

."

---

Vote Count 1-13

:

Jack ~ L-4 (Zachrulez, Sotty7, ortolan)

xRECKONERx ~ L-4 (Debonair Danny DiPietro, hohum, ekiM)
Sotty7 ~ L-4 (xRECKONERx, Locke Lamora, Vi)
hohum ~ L-5 (Percy, Jack)


Not Voting: Jahudo

With

12

alive, it takes

7

to lynch. Deadline is March 31 at roughly 3 p.m. (GMT -4).

[VP Baltar]

He said nothing. The bottle of whiskey was tilted high over his face, and I could see that he was finishing it off....So what? I thought. We can always get more. The whiskey stores opened at seven, and I didn't have to be in court until ten. There was plenty of time to do anything we wanted. Many wrongs could be righted in five hours if we had the right tools....

---

Vote Count 1-14

:

Jack ~ L-4 (Zachrulez, Sotty7, ortolan)

Sotty7 ~ L-4 (xRECKONERx, Locke Lamora, Vi)
xRECKONERx ~ L-5 (Debonair Danny DiPietro, hohum)
hohum ~ L-5 (Percy, Jack)
Debonair Danny DiPietro ~ L-6 (ekiM)

Not Voting: Jahudo

With

12

alive, it takes

7

to lynch. Deadline is March 31 at roughly 3 p.m. (GMT -4).

[VP Baltar]

"Well, Andrew,"

I said to him in a high-pitched mournful voice.

"I hate to be the one to tell you this...I don't want to hurt you, but--"

"No!"

he shouted.

"Please don't kill me!"

I seized him quickly by the hair and jerked him off balance. His eyes rolled back in his head and then he went limp.

"Stop whining!"

I snapped.

"I just want to tell you about a

legal

axiom."

"Bullshit,"

he croaked.

"You're a goddamn vicious maniac!"

---

Vote Count 1-15

:

Jack ~ L-4 (Zachrulez, Sotty7, ortolan)

xRECKONERx ~ L-4 (Debonair Danny DiPietro, hohum, Locke Lamora)
hohum ~ L-4 (Percy, Jack, ekiM)
Sotty7 ~ L-6 (xRECKONERx)
ortolan ~ L-6 (Vi)

Not Voting: Jahudo

With

12

alive, it takes

7

to lynch. Deadline is March 31 at roughly 3 p.m. (GMT -4).

Prodding hohum today.

[VP Baltar]

hohum has informed me that he had an unfortunate accident recently and will likely be V/LA through deadline while he recovers over the next few days.

[VP Baltar]

He jerked out of my grasp and leaped away, then he braced on the balls of his feet, and bashed me in the stomach with a frenzied right hook.

"You bastard!"

he screamed.

"Get away from me! You're a paranoid psychotic!"

---

Vote Count 1-16

:

Jack ~ L-4 (Zachrulez, Sotty7, ortolan)

xRECKONERx ~ L-4 (Debonair Danny DiPietro, hohum, Locke Lamora)
hohum ~ L-4 (Percy, Jack, ekiM)
Sotty7 ~ L-6 (xRECKONERx)
ortolan ~ L-6 (Vi)

Not Voting: Jahudo

With

12

alive, it takes

7

to lynch. Deadline is March 31 at roughly 3 p.m. (GMT -4).

[VP Baltar]

Let's not bring past drama into this thread. I'm going to discuss it with ortolan and if he wants to replace out still, I will be extending the deadline to Friday. I will update everyone soon.

[VP Baltar]

"We are going to Court, Andrew. We are champions! We will crush them like cheap roaches! TODAY'S PIG IS TOMORROW'S BACON!"

I spun suddenly and hurled my green beer bottle so fast across the room that it exploded against the wall like a glass bomb before he even saw it happen.

BANG!

Whirling like Quisenberry and catching a runner on the nod at second....Fantastic speed and accuracy, no reason at all, but Andrew went crazy with joy and I had to subdue him physically and give him a chance to calm down. It was almost dawn.

"Where are the telephones?"

I asked him.

"Where is a fax machine? We will kill the ones who eat us, and eat the ones we kill!"

---

Vote Count 1-17

:

Jack ~ L-3 (Zachrulez, Sotty7, ortolan, Jahudo)

hohum ~ L-3 (Percy, Jack, ekiM, xRECKONERx)
xRECKONERx ~ L-5 (hohum, Locke Lamora)
ortolan ~ L-5 (Vi, Debonair Danny DiPietro)

Not Voting:

With

12

alive, it takes

7

to lynch. Deadline is March 31 at roughly 3 p.m. (GMT -4).

[VP Baltar]

Searching for ortolan's replacement due to lack of reply to my PM. Deadline is now extended until April 2 at roughly 3 p.m. (GMT-4).

[VP Baltar]

We had no choice.

I moved quickly for the door, but he stopped me.

"Wait a minute,"

he said.

"We're almost out of whiskey."

He was right. The Old Crow pint was empty except for a few drops in one corner, and the bars would not open for three hours.

"Don't worry,"

he said.

"I know where there's more. Upstairs in the president's office."

---

Vote Count 1-18

:

Jack ~ L-2 (Zachrulez, Sotty7, ortolan, Jahudo, Locke Lamora)

hohum ~ L-3 (Percy, Jack, ekiM, xRECKONERx)
ortolan ~ L-5 (Vi, Debonair Danny DiPietro)
xRECKONERx ~ L-6 (hohum)

Not Voting:

With

12

alive, it takes

7

to lynch. Deadline is April 2 at roughly 3 p.m. (GMT -4).

[VP Baltar]

Cobalt replaces ortolan effective immediately. Having given it some consideration, I will go ahead and extend deadline further to Saturday given the disruption that ortolan's last minute replacement caused. This deadline is set and will not be moved again. Thank you everyone for your patience.

[VP Baltar]

"Wonderful,"

I said.

"We can't run out of whiskey at a time like this. Go get it. We'll need everything we can get our hands on, before this thing is over."

He chuckled and tried to sprint off, but the thing attached to his ankle made him stumble.

"Goddamnit!"

he screamed.

"I'd

kill

to get rid of this thing!"

"Don't

say

that,"

I snapped.

"We are innocent men! We are working within the system...and besides, I think I have some good crank outside in the car."

---

Vote Count 1-19

:

Jack ~ L-2 (Zachrulez, Sotty7, Cobalt, Jahudo, Locke Lamora)

hohum ~ L-4 (Percy, ekiM, xRECKONERx)
Cobalt ~ L-4 (Vi, Debonair Danny DiPietro, Jack)

Not Voting: hohum

With

12

alive, it takes

7

to lynch. Deadline is April 3 at roughly 3 p.m. (GMT -4).

[VP Baltar]

He went upstairs to loot the president's office, and I went down those long marble steps, once again, to where my Jeep was parked in front of a fireplug on the street. Hot damn! I thought. This will be a very fast day....

It was still raining. There was no other sound on the street. Only rain in the elm trees and the fast lazy slap of my brand-new white low-cut Chuck Taylor All-Stars on the sidewalk. I felt like a polar bear, and I wanted to hear some music.

---

Vote Count 1-20

:

Jack ~ L-3 (Zachrulez, Sotty7, Cobalt, Locke Lamora)

Cobalt ~ L-3 (Vi, Debonair Danny DiPietro, Jack, Jahudo)
hohum ~ L-5 (Percy, ekiM)
Debonair Danny DiPietro ~ L-6 (xRECKONERx)

Not Voting: hohum

With

12

alive, it takes

7

to lynch. Deadline is April 3 at roughly 3 p.m. (GMT -4).

[VP Baltar]

The big weird Jeep was still there, lurking peacefully under the trees and almost invisible in the mist and the hanging Spanish moss....It was huge, but it had no color. It came from the factory with no paint--only a dull stainless steel finish that soon faded to a filthy shade of yellow and millions of tiny reddish pits all over the hood and the doors and even the Panzer-style undercarriage.

---

Vote Count 1-21

:

Cobalt ~ L-1 (Vi, Debonair Danny DiPietro, Jack, Jahudo, Sotty7, xRECKONERx)

Jack ~ L-4 (Zachrulez, Cobalt, Locke Lamora)
hohum ~ L-5 (Percy, ekiM)

Not Voting: hohum

With

12

alive, it takes

7

to lynch. Deadline is April 3 at roughly 3 p.m. (GMT -4).

[VP Baltar]

Final Vote Count, Day 1

:

Cobalt ~ LYNCH (Vi, Debonair Danny DiPietro, Jack, Jahudo, Sotty7, xRECKONERx, Zachrulez)

Jack ~ L-5 (Cobalt, Locke Lamora)
hohum ~ L-5 (Percy, ekiM)

Not Voting: hohum

---

It's the gunfire that's the hardest to get used to. You would think that it would be the most natural thing in the world to hear at the fortified compound of Owl Farm.

The reports travel loudly through the open field and into the surrounding tree line. In between the thunderous cracks, a four-piece rock and roll band carries out their sound check. The squeaky chromatics have a 60's Fender tweed all over them while a bottom-heavy bass lopes slowly through a long bend. Roughly 100 meters ahead looms the Gonzo Tower.

"Hunter's dead!"

a drunken man shouts as he darts in front of you, shirtless and clearly frenzied at the news. You don't recognize him in the fading light, but then again you don't recognize many of the people at the funeral.

Over at the bar, a group has gathered and reminisces.

"You guys want to know something?"

Cobalt asks.

"I heard Hunter didn't even kill himself. Word is the Pigs finally caught up to him one night."

"Oh, yeah,"

Vi says, skeptical and signalling for another Cuba Libre.

Cobalt nods.

"The Pigs got to him for sure. It was a damn setup. They drew him right out here to this field and let him have it. I heard it was someone he knew well too. That's how they got him out there."

The band is playing now and a cool breeze scuttles across the grass in the field. It'd be a nice atmosphere to enjoy the sunset if to weren't for the ashen corpse up in that damn tower. The old boy is probably having a good laugh at all these brooding bastards.

"Sure seems like you know a lot about it,"

Sotty7 says.

"Well, that's just what I hear,"

Cobalt trails off, feeling the eyes of the group on him now.

Where would he even get such an half-cocked idea from? Hunter murdered? He had to be some kind of state-certified Lunatic. Not that he didn't have his share of enemies, but after all these years was it really believable that someone finally got the drop on him?

What if they really did send in some kind of double agent with top of the line secret spy gear? A fleet of ninjas with high grade tech to make them sound like his wife crying for help in the dead of night. Even a Doctor of Journalism can't hold out against a conspiracy like that forever. And this squirmy worm knows something.

You grab Cobalt by the arm hard and he drops his drink in a stupor. Zachrulez joins in and you drag Cobalt toward the gunfire, which has increased in fervor since the bar opened.

The Fear takes him quickly and he squeels for you to stop, calling out for Order and Reason. Once you've come this far, however, the only thing you can do is punch the throttle and try not to shit yourself. That's key.

Cobalt is hit with an array of calibers and falls into the tall grass after you order him to run for his life. The combination of weak light and heavy intoxication causes the shooters to pay little mind. Or maybe they don't care. He bleeds out with the sounds of a war banging loudly somewhere above as his vision turns gray, then black. It's a war that started long before he was born, but is certain to end by morning.

Cobalt,

Richard M. Nixon (Mafia Neighbor Maker)

, has been lynched Day 1. It is now Night 1. You have 72 hours from this post to submit any night actions you wish to use.

[VP Baltar]

The Gonzo Tower is intimidating in the near darkness. The double thumbed fist clutches it's peyote button like an eye watching down on the funeral goers.

Within, the ashes of the Doctor sit quietly inside their canister, waiting to explode. All of the Fear and anger and sheer insanity built up over the years ready to be set free across the valley below.

The large gathering stands entranced as a pair of large, official-looking men load crates of gun powder into the firing mechanism at the base of the tower. The tension is almost more than one can stand, but there will be no release. Not yet.

Night 1 has ended. Nobody has died.

It is now Day 2. Deadline is April 17 at roughly 12 p.m. (GMT -4).

---

Votecount 2-0

:

Not Voting: hohum, Vi, Debonair Danny DiPietro, Jack, Jahudo, Sotty7, xRECKONERx, Zachrulez, Locke Lamora, Percy, ekiM

[VP Baltar]

"These holes are

not rust

,"

the pompous little factory rep assured me.

"What you see here is priceless chemical

development

that was applied to this vehicle only after fifty-five years of careful research at our secret Color Lab in the Milanese Alps....So you

must

be patient,"

he warned.

"This process takes

time

. It involves the slow liberation of Astro-Bacteria, which is frequently

lethal

to laymen. And which did, in fact, end the life of the tragic genius who first invented it, a man named Squane from Austria."

---

Votecount 2-1

:

Jahudo ~ L-4 (Jack, Zachrulez)

hohum ~ L-4 (Vi, xRECKONERx)
Locke Lamora ~ L-5 (ekiM)

Not Voting: hohum, Debonair Danny DiPietro, Jahudo, Sotty7, Locke Lamora, Percy

With

11

alive, it takes

6

to lynch. Deadline is April 17 at roughly 12 p.m. (GMT-4).

[VP Baltar]

Well...maybe so, I figured. It was ugly and pitted all over with millions of festering poison pits, which boiled and bubbled constantly and infected all those who touched it....

But it was a full-bore Lamborghini hot rod, a monstrous thing that weighed 5,000 pounds with bulletproof glass and twelve cylinders with a top speed of 125 miles an hour and a .50-caliber machine-gun mount behind the driver's seat....One night on the Big Sur Highway I beat a Porsche 928 from the Carmel Bridge to Nepenthe by nine minutes, mainly because I beat her like a cheap hound on the curves. It was a small woman driving the 928 and she went all to pieces when I passed her at 110 on the Bixby Creek Bridge and then squeezed her into the sand dunes....

---

Votecount 2-2

:

hohum ~ L-2 (Vi, xRECKONERx, Percy, Jack)

Locke Lamora ~ L-3 (ekiM, Sotty7, Zachrulez)
Sotty7 ~ L-5 (Debonair Danny DiPietro)
Percy ~ L-5 (hohum)

Not Voting: Jahudo, Locke Lamora

With

11

alive, it takes

6

to lynch. Deadline is April 17 at roughly 12 p.m. (GMT-4).

[VP Baltar]

Amished replaces Locke Lamora effectively immediately because he's awesome. Welcome him!

[VP Baltar]

Why not? It happened to

me

once--in Sacramento, when some Japs in a brute Lamborghini ran me down on The Parkway like I was standing still, then bashed me repeatedly at top speed until I finally lost control....It was one of the ugliest moments of my life and I'll never forget it. Those tattooed swine! I should have had them locked up, but I was helpless.

After that, I got one of my own, for $150,000.

---

Votecount 2-3

:

hohum ~ L-2 (Vi, xRECKONERx, Percy, Jack)

Amished ~ L-3 (ekiM, Sotty7, Zachrulez)
Percy ~ L-4 (hohum, Amished)
Sotty7 ~ L-5 (Debonair Danny DiPietro)


Not Voting: Jahudo

With

11

alive, it takes

6

to lynch. Deadline is April 17 at roughly 12 p.m. (GMT-4).

[VP Baltar]

But that is another story, and I was too busy that day to even think about it. Dawn was coming up and it was still raining and I had to be in court at 9 o'clock and, ye gods, I still had this freak to deal with--this gutless zombie with a beeper on his leg who obviously needed help, and somehow I was it.

How had it happened? I slid into the Lambo and locked the heavy armored door behind me....What dangerous craziness had plunged me into this situation? All I'd wanted to do was hang out in the library for a while and read some Law.

---

Votecount 2-4

:

Amished ~ L-2 (ekiM, Sotty7, Zachrulez, Jahudo)

hohum ~ L-3 (Vi, xRECKONERx, Percy)
Percy ~ L-4 (hohum, Amished)
Sotty7 ~ L-5 (Debonair Danny DiPietro)
Jahudo ~ L-5 (Jack)

Not Voting:

With

11

alive, it takes

6

to lynch. Deadline is April 17 at roughly 12 p.m. (GMT-4).

[VP Baltar]

But somehow I wound up with Andrew on my hands. They had railroaded him into jail for five years, and now I was his only hope. One way or another, I had to get him into a courtroom situation where he'd be able to confront The System on its own mean terms. Put him on the Attack, instead of always on his knees....Right. And we needed to get that goddamn beeping manacle off his leg.

---

Votecount 2-5

:

Amished ~ L-2 (ekiM, Sotty7, Zachrulez, Jahudo)

hohum ~ L-3 (Vi, xRECKONERx, Percy)
Percy ~ L-4 (hohum, Amished)
Sotty7 ~ L-5 (Debonair Danny DiPietro)
Jahudo ~ L-5 (Jack)

Not Voting:

With

11

alive, it takes

6

to lynch. Deadline is April 17 at roughly 12 p.m. (GMT-4).

[VP Baltar]

hohum has been prodded.

[VP Baltar]

Indeed. But first things first. Calm down, cool beer, and relax with elegant music...and yes, ah ha, the

Crank

. Andrew was looking a bit limp, and we would both need special energy for the ordeal I knew was coming....Once I broke him out of jail, as it were, I would be responsible for him until my lawyers took over. They were good, and I felt sure they could get him a new trial. Never mind this

jail

bullshit. He was innocent. He never had a chance....But no more. The worm had turned. My man Andrew was about to know what it felt like to go into court like a warrior and beat the swine to death with their own rules.

---

Votecount 2-6

:

Amished ~ L-2 (ekiM, Sotty7, Zachrulez, Jahudo)

Percy ~ L-3 (hohum, Amished, xRECKONERx)
hohum ~ L-4 (Vi, Percy)
Jahudo ~ L-4 (Jack, Debonair Danny DiPietro)

Not Voting:

With

11

alive, it takes

6

to lynch. Deadline is April 17 at roughly 12 p.m. (GMT-4).

[VP Baltar]

I felt good about this, very calm and focused as I buried my face in a silver bowl of pure speed and snorted until my whole head went numb and my eyeballs seemed to be fusing together....I punched the music up to 600 watts and felt the Jeep shudder nicely as Lyle Lovett came on....Thank god this thing is soundproof, I thought, or we might have serious police problems.

Which is something I like to avoid. But it is getting harder and harder. These are bad times for people who like to sit outside the library at dawn on a rainy morning and get ripped to the tits on crank and powerful music.

---

Votecount 2-7

:

Amished ~ L-2 (ekiM, Sotty7, Zachrulez, Jahudo)

Percy ~ L-3 (hohum, Amished, xRECKONERx)
hohum ~ L-4 (Vi, Percy)
Jahudo ~ L-4 (Jack, Debonair Danny DiPietro)

Not Voting:

With

11

alive, it takes

6

to lynch. Deadline is April 17 at roughly 12 p.m. (GMT-4).

[VP Baltar]

Unfortunately, hohum has not picked up his prod. I was holding out a bit hoping he'd get on today and come back, but it appears at this point that I need to begin the search for a(nother) replacement. Please hold.

[VP Baltar]

As I walked back to the library I remembered Bobby Kennedy's words:

"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing."

But not

me

, Jack. Whatever I was doing that morning, it was sure as hell not

"nothing."

I was about to pluck an innocent victim from the jaws of The System....Hell yes! I thought. Thomas Jefferson would be proud of me today and so would Bobby Kennedy.

---

Votecount 2-8

:

Amished ~ L-2 (ekiM, Sotty7, Zachrulez, Jahudo)

Jahudo ~ L-2 (Jack, Debonair Danny DiPietro, Amished, xRECKONERx)
Percy ~ L-5 (hohum)
hohum ~ L-5 (Vi)
Zachrulez ~ L-5 (Percy)

Not Voting:

With

11

alive, it takes

6

to lynch. Deadline is April 17 at roughly 12 p.m. (GMT-4).

[VP Baltar]

The crank was taking hold, which caused me to think rapidly in odd mathematical terms and suddenly understand that Thomas Jefferson had been dead only 142 years longer than Bobby Kennedy which is not a long time in places like Egypt and Cambodia and approximately the same, in fact, as the life expectancy of the average American woman by the year 2015.

I was brooding on these things as I bounded up the long gray steps and found Andrew fretting nervously on his slab in the Main Floor Executive Men's Room. He had some rumpled-looking Xerox pages out in front of him, but he quickly gathered them up as I entered.

---

Votecount 2-9

:

Jahudo ~ L-2 (Jack, Debonair Danny DiPietro, Amished, xRECKONERx)

Amished ~ L-3 (ekiM, Sotty7, Zachrulez)
Percy ~ L-5 (hohum)
hohum ~ L-5 (Vi)
Zachrulez ~ L-5 (Percy)
xRECKONERx ~ L-5 (Jahudo)

Not Voting:

With

11

alive, it takes

6

to lynch. Deadline is April 17 at roughly 12 p.m. (GMT-4).

[VP Baltar]

"Where the fuck have you been?"

he snarled.

"I'm about to go crazy! They expect me back at the jail in twenty minutes. I'm doomed."

He eyed me sullenly and lifted a quart bottle of Southern Comfort to his lips, sucking it down his throat so fast that his eyes rolled back in his head and I thought he was passing out.

"You bastard!"

I yelled.

"Give me that goddamn bottle! I want you on your toes when we go to court. You're about to face a life or death situation!"

"Screw you,"

he said.

"You're crazy as a goddamn loon. I should have had you arrested the minute I saw you."

---

Votecount 2-10

:

Jahudo ~ L-2 (Jack, Debonair Danny DiPietro, Amished, xRECKONERx)

xRECKONERx ~ L-4 (Jahudo, Percy)
hohum ~ L-4 (Vi, ekiM)
Percy ~ L-4 (hohum, Zachrulez)
Amished ~ L-5 (Sotty7)

Not Voting:

With

11

alive, it takes

6

to lynch. Deadline is April 17 at roughly 12 p.m. (GMT-4).

[VP Baltar]

I gave him a quick Pre-Frontal Lift and bounced him off the mirror, then I seized the whiskey bottle from his hand as he slumped to the floor....

"Get a grip on yourself, Andrew,"

I said.

I gave him a rolled-up hundred-dollar bill and watched him snort almost half of our whole stash into his head like a bullet. He choked desperately for a few seconds, then leaped to his feet and fixed me with a wrong and unnatural grin. I could see that he was going sideways.

"You fool,"

I said.

"You took too much."

---

Votecount 2-11

:

hohum ~ L-1 (Vi, ekiM, Percy, Jahudo, Zachrulez)

Jahudo ~ L-2 (Jack, Debonair Danny DiPietro, Amished, xRECKONERx)
Percy ~ L-5 (hohum)
Amished ~ L-5 (Sotty7)

Not Voting:

With

11

alive, it takes

6

to lynch. Deadline is April 17 at roughly 12 p.m. (GMT-4).

[VP Baltar]

Pretty sure we're in the same timezone, Vi. Anyhow, you can start your countdown at roughly 37.5 hours...I believe.

[VP Baltar]

Final Votecount Day 2

:

Jahudo ~ LYNCH (Jack, Debonair Danny DiPietro, Amished, xRECKONERx, Sotty7, hohum)

hohum ~ L-1 (Vi, ekiM, Percy, Jahudo, Zachrulez)


Not Voting:

---

The darkness recedes in punchy intervals as the mescaline comes on. The clouds are parting now and the moonlight has come through to illuminate the narrow wooded trail you are walking single file along. Thank god for small mercies.

It was only ten minutes ago that Jack came bounding out of the brush, scratches across his face and babbling that he had found the way to Elysium, but it felt like eons ago. Somehow he convinced you and the others to follow him on the trail, but you are quickly becoming convinced that you are lost. These woods are alive and you can no longer hear the hum of the band. Overhead the leaves and branches of the trees weave together in complex geometric patterns that flow together endlessly.

It is difficult to turn your eyes from them as you drag along slowly behind Jack's confused lead. You feel heat gathering first at the base of your spine and slowly crawling its way up like an ancient vine. It slithers between your vertebrae and makes you strong like the lattice work of the canopy.

You chuckle at the though of Cobalt's body rotting away to fertilize the grass into a Cobalt-shaped patch of green. C'est la vie, asshole.

It is at this exact moment in the march that you trip and the lattice work is replaced by the darkness again. You feel your head bounce and roll in an explosion of light immediately after. It is brilliant and electric and reaches out to the warm vine that has nested in your brain now. They tie together and you are the glue. Pleasure is enveloping you over and over in pulsating waves and you are being pulled deeper into the light. Your mind is simultaneously ascending and descending toward a greater knowledge, some secret you have known since the beginning of time, yet forgot somehow.

You can hear someone screaming your name from beyond the Edge now. They scream louder and you open your eyes to find yourself half-soaked and prostrate at the edge of a shallow creek.

"Let him go!"

ekiM shouts before he lunges at hohum, who is wide-eyed on top of Jahudo and throttling him in the deepest part of the water. Hohum is eventually pulled off and lets out loud peels of laughter, but the damage is done. The cold, clear water washes over Jahudo's lifeless body.

He was an old friend, but even friends must come to an end sometimes. This long, strange trip has just begun, you think.

Jahudo,

Ralph Steadman (Mafia Goon)

, has been lynched Day 2. It is now Night 2. You have 72 hours from this post to submit any night actions you wish to use.

[VP Baltar]

At the bottom of the gully is an old dumping site. A land of forgotten relics and waste no longer deemed to have value toward Progress. A '39 Ford Coupe sits quietly, rusted to its very core and seemingly in danger of being blown away in the next strong wind.

There are noises of elves scurrying off to hidden coves just beyond your sight. You turn quickly to see them but the ground pitches off rapidly and you stumble to your left as if on a sea tossed ship.

A directionless, manic howl rips through the relative quiet as you regain your balance. It is Percy, but by the time you locate him behind a large pile of scrap tin and discarded bicycles it is too late. Some brutish freak has firmly lodged a long piece of fake brass door trim into his pre-frontal lobe via his eye socket.

The blood begins to colour your vision and soon every takes on a dark maroon hue, even your own hands. Here comes the Fear.

Night 2 has ended. Percy,

Vanilla Townie

, has been killed.

It is now Day 3. Deadline is May 3 at roughly 9 a.m. (GMT -4).

---

Votecount 3-0

:

Not Voting: hohum, Vi, Debonair Danny DiPietro, Jack, Sotty7, xRECKONERx, Zachrulez, Locke Lamora, ekiM

With

9

alive, it takes

5

to lynch.

[VP Baltar]

"

Fool?

"

he screeched.

"

Nobody

calls me a

fool

."

He laughed distractedly and lurched at me, but I shoved him away.

"Calm down,"

I said.

"We have serious business to do."

---

Votecount 3-1

:

xRECKONERx ~ L-1 (Vi, Jack, Zachrulez, ekiM)

Vi ~ L-4 (hohum)
ekiM ~ L-4 (Sotty7)

Not Voting: Debonair Danny DiPietro, xRECKONERx, Locke Lamora

With

9

alive, it takes

5

to lynch. Deadline is May 3 at roughly 9 a.m. (GMT -4).

[VP Baltar]

bump

[VP Baltar]

"Business?" he shouted.

"What kind of

business

?"

He lunged at me again, but I could see that he was going into spasms.

"You

business

bastard!"

he jabbered.

"I know what kind of

business

you're in!

Yeah!

Take care of business, Mister

Businessman

!"

Then he scrambled up to his wet marble ledge above the urinals again, clinging to a pipe with one hand and fumbling in his pocket with the other.

"Be careful!"

I said

"We'll

both

be fucked if you fall down and split your goddamn skull before we get to court."

---

Votecount 3-2

:

ekiM ~ L-1 (Sotty7, Amished, Vi, xRECKONERx)

xRECKONERx ~ L-3 (Jack, ekiM)
Vi ~ L-4 (hohum)

Not Voting: Debonair Danny DiPietro, Zachrulez

With

9

alive, it takes

5

to lynch. Deadline is May 3 at roughly 9 a.m. (GMT -4).

[VP Baltar]

Final Votecount Day 3

:

ekiM ~ LYNCH (Sotty7, Amished, Vi, xRECKONERx, hohum)

xRECKONERx ~ L-3 (Jack, ekiM)

Not Voting: Debonair Danny DiPietro, Zachrulez

---

The sky explodes in a kaleidoscope of color that shifted with each fleeting emotion. The faces of laughing children lunge at you from the darkness when you look toward the trees for a way out of this place. If only there was some damn music.

And if only it wasn't so bleeding obvious who had it out for Percy. It seems so long ago, but the pain of the loss is fresh in your mind and in your hand, which clutches a nine inch hunting blade you picked up from Owl Farm before this damn reality started caving in and if you you weren't trudging behind ekiM and finding yourself disgusted with his flowing and rapidly morphing shirt, the way it bubbles and boils with something certainly sinister underneath--THEN! If only then you wouldn't feel the resistance of his back and the giving way of the blood and viscera underneath under the sharpened blade of the knife.

hohum cackles again with delight and when you look back you can still see Percy's body on the scrap pile, the broken alter of Industry and Progress. Maybe it really hadn't been as long as you thought.

ekiM,

Whimpering Slave of the Fear (Vanilla Townie)

, has been lynched Day 3. It is now Night 3. You have 72 hours from this post to submit any night actions you wish to use.

[VP Baltar]

Music is drifting down on you like a distant winter. You can feel it approaching, ready to bluster straight through the thickest of parkas and claim your extremities with frost bite.

And yet it does not come fully. It waits until you let your guard down before delivering the Big Blow. WHAM-O.

You're back in the trees and Jack is losing it. The Fear has him fully in its grasp and he won't stop moaning about his pants.

"They're falling down!"

he exclaims. Idiot.

He stops to fritter with his belt while the group keeps walking ahead, tunnelvisioned on any escape available. Minutes (hours?) later you realize he never caught back up with the march. Another one gone. It's not worth stopping to look. Just find that damn music.

Night 3 has ended. Jack,

Raoul Duke (Freak Power Neighbor Maker)

, has been killed.

It is now Day 4. Deadline is May 7 at roughly 8 a.m. (GMT-4)

---

Votecount 4-0

:

Not Voting: hohum, Vi, Debonair Danny DiPietro, Sotty7, xRECKONERx, Zachrulez, Amished

With

7

alive, it takes

4

to lynch.

Note: Vi has informed me she will possibly be V/LA through the weekend

[VP Baltar]

He stared at me for about twenty seconds, saying nothing. Then he reached down, demanding the whiskey, and unfolded the wad of Xerox pages that he'd been reading so intensely when I came back from my run to the Jeep.

"What

court?"

he yelled.

"What are

you

--the

judge

?"

Ye gods, I thought. What now? This poor fool had been in jail for so long that he can't handle the crank and the whiskey and the freedom all at once.

---

Votecount 4-1

:

hohum ~ L-2 (Zachrulez, hohum)

Not Voting: Vi, Debonair Danny DiPietro, Sotty7, xRECKONERx, Amished

With

7

alive, it takes

4

to lynch. Deadline is May 7 at roughly 8 a.m. (GMT-4)

[VP Baltar]

"Who

are

you?"

he screamed.

"What do you do for a

living

?"

"Never mind that,"

I said.

"Right now I'm your

skyhook

--so come off that goddamn ledge and let's get some of this stuff on paper. We don't have much time."

"

Paper

?"

he screeched.

"What are you--some kind of

writer

?"

---

Votecount 4-2

:

hohum ~ L-1 (Zachrulez, hohum, xRECKONERx)

Not Voting: Vi, Debonair Danny DiPietro, Sotty7, Amished

With

7

alive, it takes

4

to lynch. Deadline is May 7 at roughly 8 a.m. (GMT-4)

[VP Baltar]

He laughed harshly.

"You want

paper

, shiteyes? I'll give you some goddamn paper.

Yeah!

I'll give you

writing

, you asshole! If you think you're a goddamn writer, get ready to drop to your knees."

Then he lifted the crumpled pages up to his eyes and started to read, but I cut him off.

"What

is

that stuff?"

I asked.

"Give it to me."

He smiled disdainfully and jerked the papers out of my grasp.

"

Stuff

?"

he said.

"You call this

stuff

?"

---

Votecount 4-3

:

hohum ~ L-3 (hohum)

xRECKONERx ~ L-3 (Amished)

Not Voting: Vi, Debonair Danny DiPietro, Sotty7, xRECKONERx, Zachrulez

With

7

alive, it takes

4

to lynch. Deadline is May 7 at roughly 8 a.m. (GMT-4)

[VP Baltar]

"Okay,"

I said.

"What is it?"

He hesitated, then smiled happily.

"This is my

writing

!"

he said.

"This is

my

stuff! This is probably the best

stuff

ever written in English! And it's

mine

! I wrote it when I was in jail--like Ernest Hemingway."

"Ernest was never in jail,"

I said.

"At least not like you. He never swept floors in a library at night with a beeper strapped to his ankle."

It was cruel, but I felt the time had come to rein him in, to flog him back to reality. But he was getting hysterical, so I let him read on.

---

Votecount 4-4

:

hohum ~ L-2 (hohum, Sotty7)

Debonair Danny DiPietro ~ L-2 (xRECKONERx, Zachrulez)
xRECKONERx ~ L-3 (Debonair Danny DiPietro)
Amished ~ L-3 (Vi)
Vi ~ L-3 (Amished)

Not Voting:

With

7

alive, it takes

4

to lynch. Deadline is May 7 at roughly 8 a.m. (GMT-4)

[VP Baltar]

"

Stand back

!"

he yelled.

"I am the most amazing writer in the world! I wrote this one night in the jail

library

, when nobody else was watching!"

"Wonderful,"

I said.

"

Read

your crazy shit."

---

Votecount 4-5

:

Debonair Danny DiPietro ~ L-2 (xRECKONERx, Zachrulez)

Vi ~ L-2 (Amished, hohum)
xRECKONERx ~ L-2 (Debonair Danny DiPietro, Vi)
hohum ~ L-3 (Sotty7)


Not Voting:

With

7

alive, it takes

4

to lynch. Deadline is May 7 at roughly 8 a.m. (GMT-4)

[VP Baltar]

Final Votecount Day 4

:

hohum ~ LYNCH (Sotty7, Zachrulez, Vi, xRECKONERx)

Vi ~ L-2 (Amished, hohum)
xRECKONERx ~ L-3 (Debonair Danny DiPietro)

---

It is ascension without Death, this drug that has you. Voices are calling out from the great beyond, pushing you forward with each step on this ground that pitches and rolls like a storm tossed ship.

The music is pulsing now as the universe collapses in on itself. But you've ceased caring. You only know that you must get back to the Tower before the good Doctor goes on his final trip.

Not everyone is so keen, however. Hohum is clawing at you and claims to know who the killer is among the group. You look in his eyes and only see insanity on full tilt. It stirs the lucid type of anger that can really be quite useful in a situation like this.

It doesn't take long for you to jump him like he did Jahudo. There is no creek this time and there is no one to stop you from feeling his pulse fade out in your grip.

The act of murder didn't find the killer, but it sure felt damn fine.

hohum,

Whimpering Slave of the Fear (Vanilla Townie)

, has been lynched Day 4. It is now Night 4. You have 72 hours from this post to submit any night actions you wish to use.

[VP Baltar]

Night is going to be extended until Sunday around 4 p.m. (GMT-4). I don't think I'll be around much on Saturday and I might not have a chance to open the thread then.

[VP Baltar]

When you break through the tree line and return to the grassy field a pale light shines beyond the horizon. To your left and far off is the Gonzo Tower. You have followed the music and can now clearly here a Dylan impersonator croaking from the bandstand.

Before you can begin to trudge toward the Tower Zachrulez falls to the ground clutching his stomach.

"This isn't right!"

he screams. He vomits blood and bile, writhing and incapable of returning to his feet.

You climb on top of him and clear his airway with two well-placed fingers. It's a maneuver you learned from a curmudgeonly nurse in '76 after a long encounter with a bathtub of neighborly moonshine.

"Who did this to you?"

Debonair Danny DiPietro asks, but Zachrulez only gives a small laugh as more blood comes up.

"Something inside told me not to....I knew it wasn't Valium. Something told me not to trust...."

You ask him who he shouldn't have trusted, but it's no use.

Night 4 has ended. Zachrulez,

Mr. Tambourine Man (Pied Piper)

, has been killed.

It is now Day 5. Deadline is May 16 at roughly 5 p.m. (GMT-4)

---

Votecount 5-0

:

Not Voting: Vi, Debonair Danny DiPietro, Sotty7, xRECKONERx, Amished

With

5

alive, it takes

3

to lynch.

[VP Baltar]

He hurled the whiskey bottle at me, but it missed and went into the stalls, where it exploded against a wall and left glass all over the floor....Jesus, I thought. This place will be a bitch to clean up in the morning--or even explain. Well, I guess I can't rightly explain this mess. Don't ask

me

how it happened. I swear. This place is normally so

clean

this time of the morning....We have convicts at night, you know. They clean the whole library, spic and span. But good God almighty. It's so ugly and horrible now that I can't stand to even see it!

---

Votecount 5-1

:

Vi ~ L-2 (Amished)

Debonair Danny DiPietro ~ L-2 (xRECKONERx)

Not Voting: Vi, Debonair Danny DiPietro, Sotty7

With

5

alive, it takes

3

to lynch. Deadline is May 16 at roughly 5 p.m. (GMT-4)

[VP Baltar]

Andrew ignored the explosion and began reading his work, in a loud and menacing voice. He had obviously done this more than once, probably in solitary confinement.... I listened curiously as he launched into the thing and started to get wound up. It was something about electric storms and Benjamin Franklin. But I was not really listening. My mind was on

court.

Meanwhile Andrew raved on, rolling his eerie phrases like a man gone wild in a trance, and I began to pay more attention. Jesus! I thought. This is pretty good stuff. I recognized a certain

rhythm

, a weird

meter

of some kind that reached me even if I wasn't listening.... It was strange. I had a feeling that I knew it all from somewhere, but I couldn't quite place it....

---

Votecount 5-2

:

Vi ~ L-2 (Amished)

Debonair Danny DiPietro ~ L-2 (xRECKONERx)

Not Voting: Vi, Debonair Danny DiPietro, Sotty7

With

5

alive, it takes

3

to lynch. Deadline is May 16 at roughly 5 p.m. (GMT-4)

[VP Baltar]

Soon I felt a queer humming all over my body, like falling into music, and for a long minute or two I actually

liked

Andrew again. He definitely had a feel for words, almost like an idiot-savant. By the time he was halfway through I was ready to give him money.

I was listening carefully now. He called his screed "Electricity" and this is how it went:

---

Votecount 5-3

:

Vi ~ L-2 (Amished)

Debonair Danny DiPietro ~ L-2 (xRECKONERx)

Not Voting: Vi, Debonair Danny DiPietro, Sotty7

With

5

alive, it takes

3

to lynch. Deadline is May 16 at roughly 5 p.m. (GMT-4)

[VP Baltar]

Final Votecount Day 5

:

xRECKONERx ~ LYNCH (Debonair Danny DiPietro, Vi, Amished)

Debonair Danny DiPietro ~ L-2 (xRECKONERx)

Not Voting: Sotty7

---

You arrive at the Gonzo Tower as they are loading the explosive into the base. 400 pounds of ball-busting terror. A one-way ticket to the Great Beyond that no one will ever forget.

It's hard to hide your giddy in spite of all the death that preceeded this moment. You're almost there now. Begin the countdown! Unfortunately, the giddy is a bit much for Debonair Danny DiPietro to control and he decides to make things a bit to "personal" with xRECKONERx. Personal like a lit roman candle shoved straight down your throat.

xRECKONERx,

Whimpering Slave of the Fear (Vanilla Townie)

, has been lynched Day 5. It is now Night 5. You now have 72 hours from this post to submit any night actions you wish to use.

[VP Baltar]

The band has stopped. The party goers are weary and the dawn is beginning to break somewhere in the distance. This is it, the Great Comedown.

The colors are peeling back slowly and are being replaced by a used up shade of grey. All that's left after all this waiting and murder is to see the old man off. You look down at Vi's crumpled corpse. Her eyes open, mouth agape in vacant terror. She would have loved this damn thing.

There's no sense in being remorseful now. No. There will be plenty of time for

that

later. Now is the time to win. Now is the time to take on the Fear. Now is the time to kill.

To everything there is a season.

Night 5 has ended. Vi,

Whimpering Slave of the Fear (Vanilla Townie)

, has been killed.

It is now Day 6. Deadline is May 30 at roughly 8 p.m. (GMT-4)

---

Votecount 6-0

:

Not Voting: Debonair Danny DiPietro, Sotty7, Amished

With

3

alive, it takes

2

to lynch.

[VP Baltar]

Final Votecount Day 6

:

Amished ~ LYNCH (Sotty7, Debonair Danny DiPietro)

Sotty7 ~ L-1 (Amished)

---

The fireworks explode in a booming terror that you can feel shudder before you hear it. It is war at high noon and the crowd off in the distance howls with delight.

The Doctor's ashes must be raining down now, but you can't see them. What you do notice, however, is Amished and Sotty7 ranting and screaming in each other's face. The words are unclear because of the thunderous clap of each successive missile.

Debonair Danny DiPietro doesn't need words, however. Words are for sniveling wimps with no balls. He is brandishing pistol that glimmers in the artificial light. He point it at each person briefly before laughing to himself. The shot is silent.

Amished,

Ralph ‘Sonny’ Barger (Paranoid Gun Owner)

, has been lynched Day 6. It is now Night 6. You have 72 hours from this post to submit any night actions you wish to use.

[VP Baltar]

Debonair Danny DiPietro tried to defend himself, but it was no use. He was out of bullets and final chances. Sotty7 lunges at him and claws his throat away with her bare hands. The Pigdogs had won, as they always do. The sun broke that morning with the Sheriff's Department vehicles bounding over the hill roughly into the gathering. They arrested most people on drug charges and various conspiracies against the state as they removed the bodies. Who would have known it was the Doctor you should have been worried about the whole time?

"Job well done, Dr. Gonzo,"

one officer said.

"Job well done...."

Debonair Danny DiPietro,

Jean-Claude Killy (Cowardly Hider)

, has been killed Night 6.

---

Sotty7,

Dr. Gonzo (Mafia Roleblocker)

, successfully pwned you all and wins!

Jahudo and Cobalt rise from their faked deaths and also win!!!! Congratulations scum team.

Roles, setup philosophy, and thoughts on the game coming momentarily.

[VP Baltar]

Night Actions

Night 1

:
Zachrulez ends night early, result: Day 2 begins

Night 2

:
Debonair Danny DiPietro hides behind Percy, result: hide successful
Sotty7 kills Debonair Danny DiPietro, result: Percy dies
Sotty7 roleblocks Vi, result: roleblock successful (Vanilla Townie)

Night 3

:
Debonair Danny DiPietro hides behind hohum, result: hide failed
Sotty7 roleblocks Debonair Danny DiPietro, result: block successful
Sotty7 kills Jack, result: Jack dies

Night 4

:
Debonair Danny DiPietro hides behind xRECKONERx, result: hide failed
Sotty7 blocks Debonair Danny DiPietro, result: block successful
Sotty7 kills Zachrulez, result: Zachrulez dies

Night 5

:
Debonair Danny DiPietro hides behind Vi, result: hide successful
Sotty kills Vi, result: Vi dies

[VP Baltar]

Mafia Roles

You are

Dr. Gonzo,

Mafia Roleblocker

. You’ve fought the good fight for a long time, but you’re a damn loose cannon with a death wish and a head full of acid. Once on the side of the downtrodden people, you’ve grown tired of the crying and pleading for your help. Time to join the fascists and take justice into your own hands. Your argumentation skills as a Samoan attorney are top-notch, so you can talk people out of doing just about anything.

• During the day you may use your cunning and vote to eliminate those against your faction.
  
• During the night you may speak to your partners XXXX and XXXX here: http://www.quicktopic.com/44/H/HH3vdaAh8MTUP.
  
• During the night you may PM me the name of one player, who you will roleblock any actions from for that night.
  
• If you choose at any time to claim a name other than your own, you know that Johnny Depp, George McGovern, and Paul Kemp are not in this game.
  
• You win when your faction comprises half or more of the remaining players, or nothing can prevent otherwise.

The game can be found here:

Mod Note: The roleblocker would take precedence over any action, including the PGO.

You are

Richard M. Nixon,

Mafia Neighbor Maker

. You are the king of the fascist pigdogs and you need to deal with any and all rabble-rousers who would dare to lust after such stupidities as life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. You have an uncanny ability to lie that could only be the result of two pigdogs breeding in black California mud under a full moon, and thus you can convince anyone that you most certainly are not a crook.

• During the day you may use your cunning and vote to eliminate those against your faction
  
• During the night you may speak to your partners XXXX and XXXX here: http://www.quicktopic.com/44/H/HH3vdaAh8MTUP.
  
• Once during the game at night, you may PM the name of a player whom you would like to converse with at any time in this quicktopic: http://www.quicktopic.com/44/H/DDkj6x82C9XyJ. The player will receive your invitation shortly after I receive the PM.
  
• If you choose at any time to claim a name other than your own, you know that Johnny Depp, George McGovern, and Paul Kemp are not in this game.
  
• You win when your faction comprises half or more of the remaining players, or nothing can prevent otherwise.

The game can be found here:

If used, the neighbor ability would send the target the following PM:

Along with

Player Name

you may now discuss the game at any time in this quicktopic: XXXX

You are

Ralph Steadman,

Mafia Goon

. You were once a good friend of those who hated the fascists, but after years of playing second fiddle you grew tired and decided to switch sides. Sure it makes you a coward and traitor, but what is more important than winning. Right? Unfortunately, you can only draw pretty pictures and don’t have any cooler abilities.

• During the day you may use your cunning and vote to eliminate those against your faction
  
• During the night you may speak to your partners XXXX and XXXX here: http://www.quicktopic.com/44/H/HH3vdaAh8MTUP>.
  
• If you choose at any time to claim a name other than your own, you know that Johnny Depp, George McGovern, and Paul Kemp are not in this game.
  
• You win when your faction comprises half or more of the remaining players, or nothing can prevent otherwise.

The game can be found here:

[VP Baltar]

Town Roles

You are

Raoul Duke,

Freak Power Neighbor Maker

. You are all that stands between this town and the fascist pigdogs that want to pave it over. When others get taken over by The Fear, you are the one who takes another hit of mescaline and goes bravely into that good night. You’ve learned over your many years in the marshes of the weird that hip-waders are a necessity.

• During the day, you may use your vote to help eliminate threats to the town.
  
• Once during the game, you may PM the name of a player at night whom you would like to converse with at any time in this quicktopic: http://www.quicktopic.com/44/H/eMHruQecbyvs. The player will receive your invitation the same night.
  
• You win when all threats to the town have been eliminated.

The game can be found here:

Mod Note: Neighbor ability would dispatch same role PM as scum counterpart.

You are

Ralph ‘Sonny’ Barger,

Paranoid Gun Owner

. You helped to found the Oakland Chapter of the Hell’s Angels and dished out more than one heavy boot in your time. Of course, you’re getting older now and all those hippies and Outlaws are just waiting for their chance to show you how it feels to have your femur broken with a baseball bat. Good thing you always keep a loaded, sawed-off shotgun in your saddlebag should the occasion to rumble arise.

• During the day, you may use your vote to help eliminate threats to the town.
  
• If you are targeted during the night, you will defend yourself with brute force, killing the person targeting you. Because there are only two rounds in your shotgun, this ability cannot be used more than twice during the game.
  
• You win when all threats to the town have been eliminated.

The game can be found here:

You are

Jean-Claude Killy,

Cowardly Hider

. At one time you were a proud, Olympic champion alpine skier. Too bad you went on to become a sniveling twit that whored yourself for a few endorsement dollars. With so much danger happening recently, you’ll do anything you can to stay out of the fray, live one more day, and cash out just a few more cheques from Chevrolet.

• During the day, you may use your vote to help eliminate threats to the town.
  
• Each night you may PM me the name of a target who you will hide behind that night, thus causing any night abilities that target you to affect the person you are hiding behind.
  
• You win when all threats to the town are eliminated.

The game can be found here:

You are

Mr. Tambourine Man,

Pied Piper

. Jingle-jangle is the name of your game and few people in this world can rock a tambourine like you. You are so good at it that you can convince the other players around you to wake up or go to sleep any time you like with a few flicks of your nimble wrist. I mean, seriously, who would think that the tambourine could be a lead instrument. You, that’s who!

• During the day, you may use your vote to help eliminate threats to the town.
  
• At any time in the game you may PM me and immediately end the current day or night phase. You may only end one day and one night phase during game and once I receive the PM you may not change your mind.
  
• You win when all threats to the town are eliminated.

The game can be found here:

You are a

Whimpering Slave of The Fear,

Vanilla Townie

. You are afraid of living your life with any sort of passion or sense of risk. Therefore, you have no special abilities and will probably die with a great deal of regret. Pathetic.

• During the day, you may use your vote to help eliminate threats to the town.
  
• You win when all threats to the town are eliminated.

The game can be found here:

[VP Baltar]

Points of order

One thing I did mildly flub is that I did not forsee the hider and the roleblocker in a one on one situation at the end. The reason I started Night 6 was because technically Sotty did have the option not to block DDD if she didn't want to. Had she not blocked him and he hid behind her, the kill would have offed her. However, the scum win condition does say they only have to comprise half of the living players, so she really had already won when Amished was lynched.

The other minor modding error I made was not including a sample vanilla PM in the rules from the start. It slipped my mind when I was modifying my ruleset for this game, but thankfully no one took advantage of this before I corrected it.

Setup design thoughts

I basically wanted to create a game that rewarded good play during the day, but only punished excessively bad play at night. I've been in too many games where I am doing well during the day phase and then suddenly a night happens and I'm on the verge of being lynched. To me, that has nothing to do with skill and has a great deal more to do with lucky night choices. Now, some would say that making good night choices has to do with good reads. I agree that sometimes that is the case and I think this setup does have some rewards for good night choices (Night ending early by Zach was an excellent choice. Had Jack selected someone to be his neighbor he would have been all but confirmed town after Cobalt died. etc.).

Overall, I am very pleased that it came down to the wire like it did and there isn't much I would change about the setup itself. I wish the neighbor roles had actually come into play because it would have been a nice extra level of deception to deal with, which would have played nicely into the flavor theme of 'who can you really trust?', but I guess everything can't be perfect.

Overall thoughts on the game

I really have to commend Sotty for pulling it out because after the way ortolan imploded Day 1 and then Cobalt did nothing to prevent his lynch (and I think it would have been easily preventable with even the mildest of effort), I thought the scum team was done. Jahudo got dragged down by this even though he was trying his best, but Sotty's lucky accident bus did well to break her free from the sinking ship and give her an actual chance.

The town got a little reckless after back-to-back scum lynches, which I can't blame them for. I've been in that situation before and this game really showed me that you can never think you've got it wrapped up in mafia because that's when you stop double checking your assumptions. The ekiM lynch was a bit of a disaster and hohum has to take the blame for that one. Quick hammering there gave Sotty time to breath and regroup herself. That being said, both the xRECKONERx and hohum lynches were probably avoidable to some extent. Both of them play a certain way that can be grating at times, but in your heart you still know they are town.

It's a tough loss for the town after such a good start, as Jack said, but it still would have been hard to get Sotty after the Jahudo lynch.

If anyone has any comments or comments on the setup and my modding, feel free to ask. All the flavor content in the vote counts came from the piece "Let the Trials Begin", which comes from HST's book

Songs of the Doomed

. I was hoping it would be finished before the game was over, but too many quick days means not enough vote counts! If you would like to finish the story, you may read it in its entirity here. (Click on the table of contents, go to Chapter 2)

Thanks to everyone for playing in my game and especially to all of the replacements.

[VP Baltar]

I have also nominated Sotty for a scummy as a result of her stellar performance. Good luck surviving after you get a little box under your name! ah ah ah

[VP Baltar]

I feel it's a bit unfair to say I imploded VP, you should try playing 4 games with Vi in all of which he tunnels on me horribly.

Well, as an objective observer I can comfortably say I disagree with you. Also, other games you're in have nothing to do with this game. I think you greatly overreacted to what began as a rather typical attack. Replacing out because you were pissed was definitely a factor in your slot getting lynched Day 1. I'm not being a jerk about it, but that was what I saw from my perspective. Ultimately, I hope you and Vi can move past it because I like you both and I think it would be a shame if you never played together again (though maybe that is necessary for the short term).