Jake Peralta - Fucking Finally

[Penelope Garcia]

8th - Jake Peralta


I feel like I have a lot of explaining to do here. I genuinely thought you were a great friend and my interactions with you were all genuine. I think we got really close on BAU and then had to further strengthen that partnership on Strike. I knew I felt far closer to you than anyone else when leaving that tribe and you were doing a lot of work in convincing me that I was your closest ally in the merge. I genuinely believed that for most of that round and even when I was considering getting you out, I was smacking myself in the head because I was worried I was making a stupid mistake. I don't think I'll ever know if I made a mistake targeting you there, but I've managed to convince myself that it was a good move. I've explained why to you, but just to reiterate, I was worried that you were already prepping my elimination by convincing everyone I was a loner and had no one. If not my elimination, at least painting me as a goat that you dragged throughout the game. I had to do something to change that narrative. I really hated that we were never able to build our relationship back to the same level that it was at before and even when we were at each other's throats, I still missed my friend in this game. I really appreciated your last message to me and how gracious you were at the end. I was worried I had completely ruined everything at that point. Even if I knew that all the messages you were sending were just throwing things at the wall and seeing what stuck, I didn't want to rub it into your face that I was finally getting my way, but also didn't just want to leave you without a response. It was such a weird line to balance but I think it was important for me to not send you home with a bad impression of me. I really wanted to heed your advice because I genuinely believe you're a great player and knew what you were talking about. I knew that I had to side with Lennie or Poirot to get far and knew Poirot was pushing Judy that round (so it was definitely possible), but with her winning Immunity, there was no way I could have sacrificed Lucifer or Rust and maintained a better position and it was far easier to throw one of them under the bus to Judy. In all honesty, I think I was dead at 6 or 5 without immunity either way and probably would not have gone further if you stayed in. Thank you for the great friendship and I hope you get the chance to play again because you are terrifyingly good at this game