Mafiascum.net

Posted: **Thu Jan 05, 2017 12:27 pm**

where am I

Posted: **Thu Jan 05, 2017 12:30 pm**

Mordor.

Posted: **Thu Jan 05, 2017 12:32 pm**

Posted: **Thu Jan 05, 2017 12:34 pm**

kuror0: Mr Frodo you should really try this soup. Its made from shadow-scum.
drealmerz: NO SAM I CANNOT. I JUST WANT ANDRIUS SOUP.
Dunn: DID SOMEBODY SAY DUNNSTRAL?
Kuror0: GO AWAY DUNNSTRAL
drealmerz: You can come play pretty princess with me if you kill andrius for me.
Dunn: OK *scampers off*
kuror0: Andrius is town tho.
drelmerz: I'm just mad still.

Posted: **Thu Jan 05, 2017 12:35 pm**

lulz

You're killing me Andy

Posted: **Thu Jan 05, 2017 12:41 pm**

MAKING MAFIA FUN AGAIN 2017

Posted: **Thu Jan 05, 2017 12:45 pm**

Making fun of Mafia again, 2017

Posted: **Thu Jan 05, 2017 12:46 pm**

People take this game too seriously at times.

Posted: **Thu Jan 05, 2017 1:11 pm**

I'm working on my masterpiece everyone pls don't daykill me

Posted: **Thu Jan 05, 2017 1:33 pm**

I believe that's a Quest hammer. Update when I get home, roughly an hour or 2 from now.

Posted: **Thu Jan 05, 2017 1:48 pm**

In post 2201, Andrius wrote:

Posted: **Thu Jan 05, 2017 1:59 pm**

A DRAMATIC RETELLING OF THE EVENTS OF D&D CURSE OF STRAHD MAFIA

LORD CLUMSY HALF-ELVEN: Strangers from distant lands, friends of olde. You have been summoned here to kill some freaking vampires. There are waaaaay too many vampires and you need to kill them. Soon.

Drealmerz: I accept this task a-

Pine: *yawn* Why can't you help us?

Lord Clumsy Half-Elven: Because watching you struggle makes for a far more interesting time.

Dunnstral: So guys I know I look like a vampire and all-

SlySly: Because you ARE a vampire. All miller claims are scum. All masons are lies. Don't believe the lies.

Creature: u wrong slysly
Creature: in fact
Creature: I think youre a
Creature: vampire

Kuror0: STOP THE MULTIPOSTS.

Creature: sr
Creature: ry

Lord Clumsy Half-Elven: *ahem* The vampires know of your quest, and are mobilizing to stop you.

Drealmz: THAT’S BECAUSE THEYRE ALREADY HERE. ANDRIUS IS ONE OF THEM. LOOK AT THAT FACE.

SlySly: That is the handsomest most townie face ever.

Drealmerz: YOURE A VAMPIRE TOO. YOU BOTH ARE.

Lord Clumsy Half-Elven: OK GO OUT ON YOUR QUEST ALREADY. GO NOW OUT OF MY HOUSE. YOU TOO DUNNSTRAL.

Dunn: awww

*some time later on the road*

Shaddow: Aren't all wizards supposed to have hats? And dwarves axes and stuff?

Shaziro: Hey now druids don’t need that shit get your iron and metal out of here. You're ruining the all-natural vibe of these beautiful lands.

Kuroi: Uhhhhhhhh, Shaz, we're in a cemetery.

Shaz: Who the hell thought going here would be a good ide-- *falls into a hole*

Almost-Everyone: Shaz!

Shaz: Its ok I found this item buried here. I wonder what it do--

DUNN: MINE GIVE IT TO ME ITS MY PRECIOUS MINE MINE MINE

Pine: Give it to me I can use it for the powers of good and help us all I recognize it from the holy texts I can surely use it!

Persivul: And how, exactly, can you help us?

Pine: I can heal myself.

Almost-Everyone: "…"

Drealmerz: IT’S A VAMPIRE. BURN IT.

Jason: How about me? I can surely make use of it.

Andrius: The holy scripture writeth that no man deserveth an item if he requesth it himself.

Drealmerz7: BURN THE VAMPIRE.

Shaddow: I think Pine should get it.

Creature: Why the hell not?

Shaz: Ok here you go Pine.

Pine: Oh cool thanks let's see what it do--

Persivul: I think we should lynch Pine.

SlySly: WE JUST GAVE HIM THE ITEM THOUGH.

Persivul: Yeah but he's scum so he needs to die.

SlySly: ok then

Creature: THEN WHY DID WE
Creature: GIVE HIM THE
Creature: ITEM?

Shaddow: murderdeathdeathdeathmurdermurder

Kuror0: Did anyone hear that?

Drealmerz: IT WAS ANDRIUS AND SLYSLY CONSPIRING AGAINST US. WHY DID WE COME TO THIS CEMETERY ANYWAY?

Pine: Oh hey look I can actually protect other people too. That's useful.

Culted: …

kuroi: …

Jason: …yeah you're dying now. But after we lynch drealmerz.

Drealmerz: NO GUISE ANDRIUS IS THE VAMPIRE

Andrius: no actually its jason

Persivul: holy crap we just agreed on something

Pine: Yeah lynch jason he wanted my item kill it

Dunn: KILL IT WITH FIRE

Jason: But guys I've been training hard to protect everyone I even have this shield thing and--

Culted: *stabs jason*

Dunn: Who the F would kill Creature?

SlySly: I'm starting to get worried Andrius is a vampire.

Drealmerz: FINALLY

Andrius: Uh, I received this weird note last night.

Drealmerz: WHAT DID IT SAY?

Andrius: Uh, it says its from you.

Drealmerz: RAUGHHEQTHQEHQETEAHREQHQEYQ$JTETJHWSTYKUEUKSHTSE YOURE A VAMPIRE THIS IS PROOF YOU ARE SHARING MY SECRET POWERS WITH THE VAMPIRES YOU MUST BE A VAMPIRE

Shaziro: So I know a lot about pigeons and ravens pls ask me questions about them. Also hey look it’s the Burgoma--

Burgomaster: DO ME A FAVOR.

Dunn: PICK ME PICK ME PICK ME I CAN DO IT I WANT THE PRECIOUS

Culted: k.

Kuror0: NOPE THAT’S MINE.

Andrius: OBTW Persivul is town move along nothing to see here.

Persivul: u srs bro how u kno dat

Culted: yea bro u tell him

Persivul: sssshhh bro dey'll hear u bro

Culted: sorry bro

Persivul: its k bro we still good bro

Culted: yea bro

SlySly: My bro betrayed me once. Long ago. Long time ago. Old wounds never heal.

Andrius: I know you don’t trust me but I got ur back bro

Kuror0: Anyone seen kuroi?

Pine: Anyone seen shaddow?

Persivul: No. But let's lynch Pine anyway.

Pine: WHY PINE? How bout drealmerz?

Dreal: ANYONE BUT ME I HAVE A CUTE DOGGIE PLS DON’T KILL US

Kuroi: awwww

Drealm: I trained him to hunt vampires but he wont attack andrius for some reason though

Andrius: Either he's not trained or I'm not a vampire.

Drealm: I TRAINED HIM SO HARD YO. HE FETCHES AND DECAPITATES AND STAKES VAMPIRES

Culted: Why don't we just lynch someone who isn't talking? They must clearly be vampires hiding in the shadows.

Kuroi: I'm still here.

Culted: SPEAKING OF SHADOWS… SHADDOWS

Pine: YEAH LYNCH IT

RABBLE: RABBLE RABBLE

*shaddows is ded vampire*

Posted: **Thu Jan 05, 2017 2:02 pm**

I don't want to know how long I spent making this.

Posted: **Thu Jan 05, 2017 2:09 pm**

I'm ready for the next chapter!!

Posted: **Thu Jan 05, 2017 2:10 pm**

In post 2215, SlySly wrote:I'm ready for the next chapter!!

We're writing it as we speak.

Posted: **Thu Jan 05, 2017 3:54 pm**

Andrius...may I bear your children?

Posted: **Thu Jan 05, 2017 3:56 pm**

The group decides to head to Lake Zarovich. After about a half day's worth of travel, an old lighthouse next to a sizable lake come into view. The lighthouse is in bad shape, with rotten wooden scaffolds along one side, looking like they were put there to facilitate repairs that were never finished. The door facing south is also dilapidated, but seems operational. Next to the lighthouse is what appears to be a small shack built into the trunk of a great tree, its roots dug firmly into the soil. The branches flow with the wind, and the door faces towards the lake. The lake itself sits rather still, it's waters reflecting some light from the (relatively) clear sky. After walking the perimeter, a dim outline of a chest can be seen beneath the surface of the water. Although old, the chest appears to be very ornate, and looks promising. It's too far from the shore to just walk to, and swimming could prove dangerous. As discussion starts about how to get to the chest, a great Ka-KOOM erupts, thunder from a storm probably. Ideas are shot down, from trying to fish for it and heave it out, to tying a rope around someone and having them hold onto it and being pulled that way. That is, until, someone slowly interrupts and points out that the sky was clear today, and no storms should be in the area. All turning in unison, the group finds that the tree-hut is no longer in the ground by the lighthouse, and is in fact uprooted and poised to attack directly behind them.

Battle errupts, with spells being flung, swords and axes cleaving into the wood, and shields splintering. One swing from the Hut takes out an entire layer of scaffolding, sending bits of wood flying into the lake. Before long, the group is forced into retreat, but the Hut just keeps coming. After being cornered by the sheer cliff of a mountain, one last attempt to bring the tree down must be made.

Andrius

lets out a fearsome war cry before charging forward, alone, one hand hidden in his bag, the other holding his shield. He leaps into the air, whipping his hidden hand forward, and then being promptly swatted out of the air by a massive branch of the Tree-hut. However, as he hits the ground, a small vial arcs towards the Tree, exploding as it impacts the front door. Flames spread outwards rapidly, and you can almost hear the hut shrieking in pain as it runs off, trying to escape the fire. Eventually it falls to the ground where it continues to burn and smolder.

The Hut has been vanquished, but you shouldn't be celebrating just yet. You have no idea where you are, let alone where that lake was compared to where you are now. And a groan from the ground pulls you back to your senses, as the group looks at Andrius laying on the ground, his shield splintered into a thousand pieces, and a rather large branch extruding from his stomach through his armor.

Andrius is dying.

Quest Resolution 3(expired on 2017-01-07 22:00:00)

Posted: **Thu Jan 05, 2017 3:57 pm**

In post 2217, Pine wrote:Andrius...may I bear your children?

YOU BETTER BE QUICK
IM DYING YO

Posted: **Thu Jan 05, 2017 3:58 pm**

THIS QUEST IS WATCHING ME DIE?!?

Posted: **Thu Jan 05, 2017 3:59 pm**

Posted: **Thu Jan 05, 2017 4:02 pm**

In post 2219, Andrius wrote:
In post 2217, Pine wrote:Andrius...may I bear your children?
YOU BETTER BE QUICK
IM DYING YO

Cure Wounds on Andrius

No you're not. Babies now.

Posted: **Thu Jan 05, 2017 4:04 pm**

SlySly
You'll have to finish the story without me.

pedit: PINEEEEE <333

Posted: **Thu Jan 05, 2017 4:04 pm**

Mafiascum.net

Mini 1859: D&D Curse of Strahd Mafia - Game Over