Three-Pronged Trouser God Mafia GAME OVER- Happy Ending?

[Gorkington]

i'll be really sad at myself for ignoring so many people calling jaqen scummy all game if we did win
he really hit a blindspot on my scumdar if so

[God of Power Outlets]

Vote Count Final

Jaqen Hghar (3) - Warped, Gorkington, DrippingGoofball

Gorkington (1) - Jaqen Hghar

Not Voting (0)

With 4 alive, it takes 3 to Lynch

We are now entering Twilight

[DrippingGoofball]

Twilight?>!?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

FUCK TWILIGHT

[DrippingGoofball]

I want to read the scum PT

NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[DrippingGoofball]

Does anyone know the safeword to end this torture?

[Gorkington]

only thing im scared of is the fact that i dont know where dgb got those results on imp from

[Warped]

Yeah wtf. Twilight? Checking in just in case that's what the mods want.

[DrippingGoofball]

only thing im scared of is the fact that i dont know where dgb got those results on imp from

A redirected scum amnesiac tracker? A message sender?

[Gorkington]

but does it make sense for jaqen to have that role on top of his vig things?

[Jaqen Hghar]

It's twilight because there's a traitor and a recruit. Have fun.

[DrippingGoofball]

Thanks for confessing scum.

[DrippingGoofball]

No way, though, I don't believe that.

We're not 4 players and two scum.

[Jaqen Hghar]

I was town so now either they cross kill, co win, or one gets over on the other. Either way probably a town loss here.

[God of Power Outlets]

[The four communers stand at the town square. Intrepid reporter Tara Kockov and her handy cameraman Ben are documenting the events.]

"You guys don't have to do this today," shouts Tara over the roar of hellfire and wind. The screeches of the damned souls battling one another threatens to drown her out. "You can spare everyone today!"

"No," shouts Warped, trying not to be distracted by the Cock Dragon that's fighting Sarah Palin who rides in a giant mech suit. "This ends now!"

"We've decided," says

Lady Serene

, DrippingGoofball, "It was always Jaqen!"

"No!" Screams Jaqen, "It's Warped! Wait, it's Goofball! Wait, no, it's Gorkington!"

"Enough," says Gorkington. "It's now or never!"

[They hand DrippingGoofball a ceremonial sword. It faintly radiates with the dim power that remains of the Trouser Gods. Perverted runes are etched along the blade. With two other Communers asserting their assent, DGB casts the final vote by beheading Jaqen Hgahar. His body slumps to the ground, blood spilling upon it. For but a moment, the war within the Commune stops. The raging wind of hellfire cease and complete silence gives way.]

"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHH WHAT A RUUUUUUUUUUUSH!"

[The voice booms from the Heavens. The Three-Pronged Trouser God descends from the heavens, white and pink light radiating from its throbbing manhood. The attacking Republicans and Evangelicals burn to ash when the light touches them. Disembodied Dubya evaporates into nothingness, melting away into the clouds.]

Jaqen Hghar - Jim Austin - Repudickans Vigilante Neighbor

has been lynched

"Thank you, my children," says the Three-Pronged Trouser God, addressing the three survivors of the Commune. "Though there have been many sacrifices, you have returned me to power in this holy place. For serving me faithfully, I grant you gifts of pleasure.

DrippingGoofball, aka Denise the Dom. I grant you perfect memory. May you always and forever know your safewords.

Gorkington, or Viola Vale, last of the Great Vale line. I grant you fertility. You shall lead a new generation of WereDickWolf seers. May you defend mankind's dicks.

Warped, Agent Aardvark... You sacrificed your career in the name of protecting your way of life. I grant that your fursuit will never need cleaning, and its strategically placed holes shall always give you pleasure."

[Tara Kockov looks up to the skies]

"What about me?" she says.

"Tara Kockov," says the Trouser Gods, "You were following me all along in your heart. I grant you the gift of knowledge. Through your firm, but soft hands, you may gain insight into anyone's dick secrets."

[She bows in gratitude as the Trouser Gods address Cameraman Ben.]

"Benjamin Dover," says the Trouser Gods, "For your services to my Free Love Commune, I grant you the gift of power. And a task. Several congressional seats are now open thanks to the events of today. It is my will that you shall take one of them, and defend me against my political enemies."

"Oh. Great. Just what I always wanted," says Ben, not convincingly.

"And now, my children. Go forth and be fruitful! Multiply, that the Free Love Commune may once again return to its glory of orgies and decadence!"

[With that, the orgy begins. Somewhere, light years away, in a small metal spaceship, two dong-shaped extraterrestrials discuss the outcome of these events.]

"So," says one of them, "The only human that knew of our existence is now dead."

"Yes," says the other, "And now nothing can stop us from taking over the world."

"We must bide our time, for the Trouser Gods are too strong right now. But soon, very soon the time will be right."

[The two aliens laugh with one another. Back on Earth, the orgy is in full force. The Trouser Gods are radiating erotic energy to everyone. Our story comes to a happy conclusion, and all is well in the Free Love Commune. But for how long?]

DrippingGoofball - Denise the Dom - Commune One-Way Neighbor

Survived

Warped- Agent Aardvark - Commune Corrupt FBI Agent

Survived

Gorkington - Viola Vale - Commune Dick Seeing Seer

Survived

TOWN WINS!

[hiplop]

I WIN

[Sakura Hana]

I don't understand how Jaqen wasn't lynched earlier after using the same exact fake claim as Voided...

[Titus]

Good job Jaquen. You didn't win, but you gave it one hell of a shot. Given the odds against you, it was good you survived that long. The setup pretty much confirmed you as scum six ways from Sunday. I'll have more to say later after I'm done mourning the loss of my Cowboys.

[ika]

people will now understand that i do not repalce out. the few times i do is due to rl reasons.

[Spiffeh]

gj fam

[DrippingGoofball]

I don't understand how Jaqen wasn't lynched earlier after using the same exact fake claim as Voided...

4 realz?

[kuribo]

http://forum.mafiascum.net/viewtopic.php?f=90&t=63008 for the dead PT

The neighbor PTs and scum PTs will be up and about soon too

[Spiffeh]

Also Jaqen why did you kill me?

You might have won if you left me alive.

[Sakura Hana]

I don't understand how Jaqen wasn't lynched earlier after using the same exact fake claim as Voided...

4 realz?

yeah, they claimed the exact same person, just read the Dead PT, we were all there staring at how he wasn't lynched yet.

[Jaqen Hghar]

LIES! THE MOD LIES! I WAS TOWN!

[Xtoxm]

Good work guys.