Bastard Mod mafia - GAME OVER!

[DrippingGoofball]

My role is SO BAD... I HATE THE MOD! HATE HIM!!! HAAAaaAaaaATE HIm!

Not random. The first person to ask politely, I will claim.

vote: DrippingGoofball

[DrippingGoofball]

No, CES.... I'm the bandwagon for today!

[DrippingGoofball]

vote: DrippingGoofball

God bless you. Am I feeling some slight pressure to claim already?

Looks like Pariah is trying to tell us he can only vote and unvote.

[DrippingGoofball]

Thank you, MoS, Fortify, thank you Fritzler, for sacrificing your valuable votes on an unworthy player such as me.

Phew! I am sweating bullets from this intense pressure for me to claim, why, I am near being lynched, maybe I can help push you all over the edge to finish me off without looking scummy.

This may be "Bastard Mod," but I will have to nominate my role for "worst role ever."

It's so absurdly bad, the Mod didn't even bother giving it a name.

I do have a name for it, though, and that name is "Loser."

(1) There is no win condition for me. I have already lost. That's my role. I have lost.
(2) I cannot acquire a win condition. I am guessing this to mean that even if I were recruited by some cult, if there is one, I still can't win.
(3) My role is that I have lost.

There is a very useless feature about my role. Well, useless to me, anyway. It really doesn't make much sense at all, I had to inquire to make sure I read correctly. But there is something that might come up. It still won't make me win, though.

If I say what it is, it will prevent it from working. There is one turn of event that might occur, and that turn of event would result in one scum revealing him or herself.

Not that I care.

I have already lost.

So you can lynch me, or vig me, or the Mafia can take care of me at night, please.

Or I can hang around until that scumtell comes up, which it might or might not, I can't promise anything. If you do keep me around, I doubt I'll be checking this game regularly, so don't be shy to have me mod-prodded if anything turns up.

COUNT of MAGNANIMOUS, GENEROUS, MERCIFUL VOTES:

DGB 3: (MoS, Fritzler, Fortify)

[DrippingGoofball]

And thank you, bertrand. I am not sure what makes me more giddy with happiness, your vote, or your unassailable logic.

To answer your question about how likely it might be for scum to reveal themselves, well, it depends on what they do or say. Tragically for me, the likelihood of them doing and saying something I don't want to specify, increases as the number of players in the game decreases. But please do not see this as a reason to prolong my tenure unnecessarily.

[DrippingGoofball]

Maybe Pariah could form words assembling the first letters of each person he votes for. For instance, this alphabet:


Armlx
Bethelmark
Coron
DrippingGoofball
E=Arimnaes
Fritzler
GreenLiquid
H=ChannelDelibird
I=Cogito Ergo Sum
J=Machiavellian-Mafia
KaleiÐoscøpe
L=marc.six
Mastermind of Sin
N=Pariah
O=PBuG
Primate
Rhox
Shamrock
Thok
Ubertimmy
viper0933
w=bertrand
Y=Fortify
Ziliu

FOR INSTANCE,

vote: viper0933
vote: PBug
vote: Thok
Vote: Arimnaes

vote: DrippingGoofball
vote: GreenLiquid
vote: bethelmark

vote: Cogito Ergo Sum

vote: bethelmark
vote: Arimnaes
vote: GreenLiquid

vote: Fortify
vote: PBuG
vote: Ubertimmy
unvote

Would translate into: "Vote DGB, I beg you"

[DrippingGoofball]

*hugs CES and pBuG*

Thank you CES for pointing it out! You are a true pal! If you hadn't pointed it out, I might have unknowingly prolonged my agony by as much as several hours.

re

vote: DrippingGoofball

[DrippingGoofball]

MmmMmMmM....

Do I prefer to be lynched, or vigged? Same difference, I don't give a rat's behind.

However... since you're asking... I would really,

REALLY

,

REALLY

like to be night-killed. That would be the only way I might have any fun at all in this game that I have already lost.

[DrippingGoofball]

By night-killed, I mean by the Mafia.

That's what I want. I want to be night-killed by the Mafia.

That would be the most fun.

Here, scummy-nummy-num-num! I am the doc! I am the cop! I am the tracker!

[DrippingGoofball]

Fortify, I personally don't care whether I'm dead or alive in this game.

Since I've already lost, I've given the players that have a chance of winning all the information that's fit to give. My presence *might* provoque an eventual scumtell, and there is a glimmer of a possibility of some fun for me if I am nightkilled by the Mafia. Not the Town; the Mafia.

You can dispose of me as you please.

[DrippingGoofball]

Why I am still posting if I lost? I like to talk, what can I say. Plus, there *may* be a few interesting turns, who knows? I'm in for the fun, as always. And much to my delight, this game is turning to be rather fun for me, even though I am so tragically role-challenged. Winning isn't everything. You win when you have fun, and when people have fun playing with you.

For the record, I have no post restriction.

You guys are there inventing all kinds of theories, lyncher, kamikaze and whatnot. You're complicating things for nothing. I am not trying to confuse anyone, I am trying to be as clear as I can without quoting my PM. It is exactly as I have explained it. I am keeping one little bit as a secret, because if I reveal it, the scumtell won't work. If you all want me to reveal it, I will, but then you lose the potential scumtell, and then for sure, you better lynch or vig me because there will be no potential for me to do anything at all in the game.

As for the theory of setting myself up for a cushy endgame, well, it's not going to happen. You are going to have to get rid of me, for instance, if that scumtell comes up, you might choose to send me on my merry way to the electric chair in order to verify what I will then explain to you when I tell you so-and-so is scum. So... not only have I lost, but there is no way I am making it through anywhere near endgame.

One upside for the Townies (but that upside will be no longer exist from the very fact that I am pointing it out now, so that's no reason to keep me) is that so far I've been a legitimate bandwagon for the scum to jump on. I've given them a nice ride for a free, quick day 1 lynch without them looking scummy at all. How much do you want to bet they were all on it at some time or another? Haha.

So yes, in an indirect way, even if I have lost, I can still have some influence on the game. It's kinda cool, actually, when you get right down to the wire. Maybe it is the best role ever - nothing to gain, nothing to lose.

[DrippingGoofball]

Yeah... well, I could have messed up with the Town or the Scum, do I care which? There would be no strategy in it, I would find that boring.

Would there be a purpose to that, other than annoy people? I am a goofball, but I do respect people's time and commitment to this game, and I would not ruin things for everyone just for the sport. I would make a lot of enemies - and not the fun, light-hearted, chummy kind of enmity. The real kind.

So... you guys have fun, sit back and enjoy the "audience participation!"

[DrippingGoofball]

I would guess that Masterchief has been made a Kamikaze in order to result in a quick cure for his boundless enthusiasm to play in this game.

[DrippingGoofball]

Marc.six, so that there is no confusion:

(1) The fun comes if I am Mafia night-killed.

(2) If I say what the scumtell is, it won't happen. But if there is a concensus for me to reveal it, I will. Again - I am not on any side.

[DrippingGoofball]

In the middle of the day sometimes my Mom will say
"Rosita, mi amor, It's time for your siesta."
A siesta means a nap and so I'm here in bed,
But wishing Mom had said "It's time for your Fiesta."
YA-HOO-HOO-HOO!

Fiesta, Fiesta, ha!
That means a party, fiesta, a party, with lots of girls and boys
Fiesta, Fiesta, with one big pinata and little toy trumpets to make lots of noise!
Ya-hoo-hoo!

Chorus:
One two three, Fiesta
Uno dos tres, Fiesta
One two three, Fiesta
Uno dos tres!

Fiesta, Fiesta, Yeah! That means a party, fiesta, a party!
With every single friend, it's time for your Siesta
And so this Fiesta must come to an end.

Chorus

In the middle of the day sometimes my mom will say
"Rosita, mi amor, it's time for your Siesta."

[DrippingGoofball]

The conversation about siestas and fiestas reminded me of a Sesame Street song! I posted the lyrics for you all to sing it while waiting for the Mod.

[DrippingGoofball]

I know. But she is driving me insane. @dripping golf ball: how old are you??(if you don't mind me asking)

Yes, I am forty-one years old, and I play Mafia.

[DrippingGoofball]

Looks at this point that DBg=Kamakazi, although her behavior here is quite less severe than in PRM:M where she was Kamakazi, so I'm not sure about it.

I know no-one will believe me, but I really do think that she's an anti-town role getting an excuse to hide. If someone had claimed cop then changed the story as many times as her they'd be lynched by now.

Ahem! What game are you playing Primate? It doesn't seem to be the same game where all in.

This is Bastard Mod.

Did you mean to post the above in Bastard Mod?

'Cuz I never, ever claimed cop.

[DrippingGoofball]

That's precisely why I suggest vigging DGb. There's no bad result: We kill a role not helping us out (not a power role), we kill scum, or we avoid a Kamakazi kill. Win-Win.

Duh, I am not a Kamikaze.

If I had "getting myself lynched" as a win condition

I'd be lynched already. I know how. I consider myself the expert. Nobody knows how to orchestrate a self-lynch as masterfully as I. And I have the track record to prove it.

Vig me if you want, but there won't be a scumtell if you do. It's your choice.

But one thing I'm not, is a Kamikaze. Why would I state that things will be more fun if I am Mafia night-killed, rather than vigged or lynched, if my winning condition is to get myself lynched?

Your suggestion and insistance that I may be a Kamikaze in this game is so patently absurd, it's downright scummy. But I'll leave it to those that have an actual stake in the game to decide.

[DrippingGoofball]

How very polite DrippingGoofball.

You're welcome, Sugar. May I offer you some tea?

Can I ask Millie to toast some fresh crumpets for you, dear?

You must be hungry, coming to visit us like this on horseback. Here, let me take your hat. Pray tell, how's Aunt Alma?

[DrippingGoofball]

Like the true Bastard Mod that you are, you waited for 12/13 votes to lynch so that the poor replacement has the biggest possible hurdle.

Diabolical.

[DrippingGoofball]

Dodongo dislikes smoke.

ANAGRAM SOLVER:

SKIDDED OMEN LOG I OK SOS
SKIDDED MEN GOO SOILS OK
DODGED SOME I KINK SOLOS

Conclusion: "Scum" does not write in coded anagrams.

Googling "Dodongo dislikes smokes":

And if you grew up playing Nintendo, there's a 100% chance you've been exposed to Engrish. The magic of statistics, people. Not even the praised and acclaimed Legend of Zelda is an exception. In fact, due to the Zelda seires' popularity, the mysterious old man is practically an Engrish icon today, and the phrase "

Dodongo dislikes smoke

" is nearly as often quoted as the infamous "

All your base are belong to us

."

Conclusion: Some kid plays too much Nintendo.

[DrippingGoofball]

I don’t think that we should lynch DGB YET. She likely wants to be killed for a reason; she could be Jester or Kamikaze. DGB may not have lost yet, but lynching her could be bad. Remember she supposedly wants the Mafia to hit her. Something’s up, but we can’t know what. Let us wait for a reply to CDB before acting.

Read. READ!!!

You know I can get myself lynched IF THAT'S MY WINNING CONDITION.

I have no winning condition.

I don't have time to check out the Jester role, I am at an internet cafe.

I don't "want" to be killed. It doesn't matter either way.

What I've been trying to say over and over, and that some of you keep refusing to understand, is that *something interesting* will happen if the Mafia tries to nightkill me. That something has the potential of helping the town find one scum. No more.

But I personally don't really care either way.

It's your choice, whether you prefer to keep me around or not.

[DrippingGoofball]

What I've been trying to say over and over, and that some of you keep refusing to understand, is that *something interesting* will happen if the Mafia tries to nightkill me. That something has the potential of helping the town find one scum. No more.

Why are you openly discussing details like this? You've got no chance of being mafia killed if one of them get's revealed, that's like suicide.

Vote:DGB

Two reasons.

First, you guys kept pushing me to reveal more and more details as you are refusing to believe me, and misunderstanding my repeated, yet simple, explanations.

Second, I lost, remember? It's up to you all to decide whether I should reveal everything. I've already told you that. I've told you that if I say everything, you will lose the scumtell.

And what did a lot of you do? Call to vig me, express disbelief, but mostly completely misunderstanding (perhaps on purpose) what I have told you about my role.

Read your own sentence "You've got no chance of being mafia killed if one of them get's revealed, that's like suicide." Please don't make me say more if you care about the Town winning, and make me say more if you care about the scum winning. But you are on to something in a twisted kind of way.

I have lost, but the Town can make some use of me. They do not know how now, but this will be revealed when the time comes, don't worry. Be patient. If you're Town.

Glork - my role doesn't even have a name. I've been told I've lost. There's something else, too, but it relates to the scumtell. If you push me more, the Townies would be wise to lynch you. Their call.

[DrippingGoofball]

My wife kicked me out, I was passed out drunk on a city bench. Just kidding.

I don't know.

I have told you everything (or nearly everything) I have been told about my "role" if you can call it that, and have have no actions. I know things can be done to me, and if you side with the Town I recommend that you not push this particular issue.

It's made me very curious, though. Very strange. Totally doesn't fit with what I have been told. Or maybe it does, but I cannot figure out how.

[DrippingGoofball]

I'm reluctant to share the rest of my information before we know what DGB's special scumtell is, as if she was scum she could use it to fake-claim that ability. Unfortunately the only way for us to find that out it seems is for DGB to die. Not sure I want that to happen yet because I'm leaning towards believing her for now. I have a suspicion of what her extra clause might be that makes sense with my evidence - however, my evidence could also be interpreted as flat-out confirming her as scum. Before I can be sure about which it is I need to know what her extra ability is.

OK - I am itching to answer your post, CD, because I think I've figured out how the scumtell ties in with everything. I am pretty excited about it. It's very cute. Be patient. You WILL find out, I don't know when, but you will find out.

But be careful. As I am reading your posts where you are "thinking out loud" trying to figure things out, I can't help but think that they might be helpful in giving the scum some ideas. Maybe. Be careful.

I know it's not advice generally popular with townie culture, but the less said about me, the better.

Have faith and patience.

[DrippingGoofball]

If, as my evidence suggests could be true, she helps the town if the mafia night-kill her, what self-respecting mafia would kill her now?

Actually, that's a very good point.

You might as well lynch me, because I am no longer useful. You're right; the Mafia won't night-kill me now.

The Townies can blame themselves for this lost opportunity. I tried to hint at something, and I explained that if I had to tell everything about my role, the scumtell wouldn't happen.

Unfortunately, many of you pressed on, and questioned me, repeatedly misinterpreted my clear and abundant explanations (on purpose, perhaps?), voted for me, called me a Kamikaze, or that other role I forget, etc., and I was forced to tell you more and more, until such point that I pretty much told everything. Or nearly everything.

You can't fault me for not making an effort explaining it in the greatest detail possible. I did my best.

You can all thank Fortify, CES, Primate, etc. for their inability to "get it" and ruining what might have been a great play for the Town.

You can't lynch me now.

[DrippingGoofball]

I mean... you CAN lynch me now...

[DrippingGoofball]

The only thing I haven't told is the actual scumtell. But now that it won't happen, and that you might as well just go ahead and lynch me, I'll tell you what it would have been, had you played intelligently, if you want.

The only way the scumtell would surface now, I suppose is if the scum was FORCED to get rid of me in endgame, and I wouldn't trust anyone saying that myself, so I don't blame you if you don't trust me. I can't think of any situation where the scum would have to night-kill me or else, so if enough people are curious, and want to know, I'll tell the rest of the role I was keeping to myself.

[DrippingGoofball]

Now that the mafia aren't going to kill you in a million years, care to explain exactly what would have happened if they had?

Sure. Let's continue to play stupidly, why stop now?

[DrippingGoofball]

I don't really care if you confirm me being this or that, I've already lost, and I am not on anyone's side, though the way the role is set up I can only benefit the Town, if I feel like helping out. If I chose to play out a role without a winning condition.

Anyway.

Here's the deal.

The Mafia CANNOT kill me. So there you have it. Instead, something else happens. It's nothing bad, it's not a reflecting vig ability or anything of the sort. It's something that the Mafia can play right, or wrong. If they play it wrong, and I am almost certain that they will, there will be a scumtell. I am still not telling what the scumtell was, unless some of you Townies are really dying to miss out completely and are in a wild rush to lynch me because I've already claimed, as has PBug, an no one is saying anything significant beyond picking between me and PBug to lynch.

That's why I think I was "out" at night, being out might explain why the Mafia cannot kill me, because I certainly have no action, night or day. To die, I need to be vigged or lynched.

@Fortify - the thing about the scumtell is that it's a clever little twist of fate that didn't jump out at me when I read my role PM. It doesn't say "if the Mafia tries to kill you at night, there will be a scumtell." Not even close. But after a while, I realized, hey! There is something that might happen, after all, and I let people know about the possibility.

[DrippingGoofball]

DrippingGoofball's house is full of guns, knives, and bombs.

A-HA!!!

You are lying. Your role is not an investigative role. Your role is a KILLING role, and you tried to kill me last night. What you just wrote is dangerously close to what I expected the scumtell to be.

[DrippingGoofball]

You are lying. You are not a vig.

You are Mafia.

[DrippingGoofball]

You are Mafia, because I CAN be indeed be vigged.

Only the Mafia cannot kill me.

[DrippingGoofball]

Speculate about me as you please.

But I do know that you are Mafia.

That WAS the scumtell.

What possessed you guys to choose me as a target??? That was uber-stupid, haha.

The scumtell is out, incredibly and against all odds and expectations.

Now, I truly have outlived my usefulness. You guys decide what you want to do with the information, but from this moment on, there is really nothing for me to do in this game.

I advise the Town to put me out of my misery by way of lynch or vig (the REAL vig this time, please), and get rid of ChannelDelibird in a similar fashion.

[DrippingGoofball]

It does tie in, but go ahead and lynch me today, guaranteed you'll be lynching CD tomorrow anyway.

Here's the scumtell: if the Mafia tries to night-kill me, they will be falsely told I am a Serial Killer. Bastard mod indeed. Now, that's not literally what ChannelDelibird is saying, but it's along these lines enough for me to know he's scum today, and for you to find out tomorrow.

So... lynch me, and when you see that I am not a serial killer, you'll be lynching CD tomorrow.

Have a ball!