Balto the Meet: May 28 to June 5, 2013

[kuribo]

/in

unless I don't have transportation by then.


gotta make sure the lower shore is represented, you know. I'm not bringing any muskrat, though since it'll be out of season by then.


Matt, just promise me you don't live like, in park heights. I don't feel like getting stabbed.


also please don't make us go to an Orioles game

[kuribo]

okay then yeah totally in

[kuribo]

What's funny is that I made my comment about park heights before I read the thread and got to page two with all the stabbing. Even future NFL hall of famers in baltimore get accused of stabbing people.

I mean there's a reason that the state penitentiary in jessup was nicknamed "The Cut"

Also don't forget for the non locals that Baltimore has a ludicrously high rate of STDs

[kuribo]

can people make this if its like May 30-June9?

YES
Better for me.

Better for me too I think

Edit: yes definitely better since I have to work memorial day

[kuribo]

Oh, hey, can we take the non-locals to The Block?

[kuribo]

no, but seriously, guys, The Block

[kuribo]

yay, I'll be able to cross "Take DGB to a strip club" off my bucket list!

[kuribo]

They have those on The Block too

[kuribo]

So is uberninja coming? I'd also like to scratch "introduce uberninja to a crackwhore" off the bucket list.

Like if she's 6'5" and says her name is Starla, just ignore the Adam's apple

[kuribo]

All jokes about crackwhores and stabbings aside though, this meet is gonna be awesome

[kuribo]

Haha. You can reenact your favorite zombie movies. Except they're PCP freaks instead of zombies.

[kuribo]

Some of the.scummers are probably picturing 28 Days Later only with more diseased prostitutes.

I have no room to talk. I live on the lower eastern shore. One time the former governor of Maryland publically referred to my area as a "shithouse." The rest of the state must have agreed because he got reelected.

[kuribo]

Also, suck my dick

SAVE IT FOR THE CRACKWHORES SHEESH

[kuribo]

i want some head

so go with me to The Block, bring a 20-rock, and you'll get some head and herpes


i mean, i'm trying to hook you up

[kuribo]

Judging by what is currently being planned for the meet, ey'd also be woefully excluded because of age.

Assuming this is aimed at me, nah. Met many of the people who've said they're going thus far before.

yeah but you haven't met me.

I CAN ALWAYS BABYSIT THE YOUNG'UNS

and I'm certified as a caregiver in Maryland, so I can sit with DGB

[kuribo]

i made jello sohoters

[kuribo]

gotta admit, i'm interested to see how he flakes at f2f mafia

[kuribo]

bought me a car today, definitely coming

[kuribo]

i'll be sure to bring germs from the eastern shore


too bad I can't really bring any muskrat

[kuribo]

The Ravens are going to the Super Bowl! There's gonna be LOTS of stabbing in Baltimore tonight!

[kuribo]

i'll be sure to bring germs from the eastern shore


too bad I can't really bring any muskrat

where on the eastern shore do u live? we have a good friend from the eastern shore.

Dorchester county

[kuribo]

close to talbot county?

yeah, I work in Talbot county, actually

[kuribo]

That one year it was a huge deal in local media when Baltimore almost had less than 300 murders in a year.

[kuribo]

The funny thing is that ad soon as I open my mouth, anyone from Baltimore immediately knows I'm from the lower shore. And my accent isn't even that thick.


I was with some friends in Severna Park of all places and a clerk looks right at me and says "you're from across the bridge, aren't you?" Although he also said I talk faster than most shore folks.

[kuribo]

If you don't sound like this:

Ainchu gawn kim doon in watch the oreos gim? I' da rain comes we kin sit unner ma orning in sip sim wooder!

You ain't from round these parts.

You're thinking hoopers island and crapo. Though I do pronounce it "wooder " as in "lot of the people that live on the island are woodermin." My ex broke me of saying ain't, since her family was of better class.

[kuribo]

I also learned on Intervention that Baltimore is known for the high quality of its heroin.

Yeah when my mother and stepdad were using, they would drive across the bridge once a week because their dealer lived a few blocks over from Hopkins.

[kuribo]

Its still a really awesome city, though. It just has its issues like any other big city.

[kuribo]

yeah i mean i already said i'd be there

[kuribo]

Got me a car today, definitely coming if my work gives me off

Coming anyway for a day or two even if they don't.

[kuribo]

BLOCK party

A Gay Time In Charm City

PartyMore



ooh, Quoth the Raven, Partymore

[kuribo]

Welp. As it stands my % is down to 10% or so. For going to this.

Ex moving out and needing roomates is not fun. Even then I think the odds of a meet in Columbus if people were interested went up to 80%

raise your hand if you didn't see Elmo flaking


i'm kidding, of course, sorry you won't make it

Replacement needed:
Current Date - January 31

Balto: The Meet

Hosts: MattP & TheTrollie

Status:

Pre-meet phase

Replacing:

Elmo TeH AzN

[kuribo]

Hahaha funny.

Well when your ex moves out of the house you own and you have to find people to live with you to help out. Money becomes sorta tight.

my ex did move out of the house we own


i'm squatting here until they foreclose

[kuribo]

We need to change the name to "Ball to the Meat"

when we meet, i'm going to shake my head in disappointment over that joke

[kuribo]

hey matt, try not to get your car flipped over by the partygoers tonight

[kuribo]

Hey, here's a fun game we can play in Baltimore. It's called the Irsay sprint:

1) Walk up to anyone over, say, 50.
2) Say, "Bob Irsay was an American hero."
3) Run. This person will kill you if they catch you.

[kuribo]

yeah I'll totally be using a fake name at the meet so Uber doesn't do that to me on the site

[kuribo]

I'm like 95% as long as I can get the time off from work.

I'll definitely at least stop in for a day if I can't, though.

[kuribo]

I feel bad because I royally sucked that game and "audiowhoring it up" implies that he will indeed be talking about it with people who did not suck, and pointing and laughing at me in the corner. Or not and I'm exaggerating but yeah.

Don't look at me, I flaked out.

[kuribo]

Open your mind


Open your miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnd




Opeennnnn yourrrrr miiiinnnnndddd

[kuribo]

Remind me in the next month or two to get driving / parking directions

[kuribo]

There are lots of parks around, a cool wooded area we can go through one night,

oh no you don't, not falling for that shit again

[kuribo]

so if you guys don't eat meat i guess i won't be btringing any muskrat from the lower shore? :p

[kuribo]

http://www.eregulations.com/maryland/hu ... ns-limits/

muskrat season ends march 15, but at the time of the meet we can still legally chase (but not kill) racoons


yes, maryland has a racoon chasing season

[kuribo]

An Eastern Shore hillbilly that "accidentally" spotlighted a deer with his head lamps and ran it over with his truck.

i don't think my 97 ford escort would do too much to bring down a deer, but you reminded me of a story

my old roommate was originally from DC. her husband was from the back woods of tennessee. he was one of like 12 kids, 10 of which were boys. each of those 10 boys went on to have between 3 and 6 kids of their own. so between brothers, cousins, nephews, uncles, etc, there were about 45 - 50 people in his immediate family. and they were pretty tight-knit, so most of her stories about her in-laws started off with "there were 'bout five of them this one night..."

so anyway, my roommate is in her apartment one night, and one of her husband's brothers starts beating on the door. there's bout three or four of them, and they want her husband to come help deal with this deer that they've killed. keep in mind, it's like the middle of the night. so, he says whatever, as long as he gets some of the meat, he'll help them move the carcass. so he leaves. When he comes back, he's all cursing and swearing. She goes "what happened? did you find the deer?" He tells her that they had lied. It was a cow, not a deer. They had snuck onto some dude's farm, shot a cow, and needed help bringing it back.

Yes. Bringing it back. They brought it back to the apartment. At 2am. Five Tennessee rednecks dragging a dead cow into my roommate's apartment. And what's more, they start butchering it in her kitchen. Now, I've never butchered a cow, but she assured me that the sound of these guys sawing through the bone was extremely loud. she was terrified they'd wake the neighbors. (apartment, as I said) So, they butchered the cow as best five drunks can, and what do you think they did with what was left?

THEY WRAPPED IT IN A WHITE SHEET AND LEFT IT IN THE DUMPSTER OUTSIDE THE BUILDING.

bloody, horrible white sheets with slaughtered cow parts just left in a dumpster. my roommate wound up calling her father to come get rid of it before the authorities found it.

[kuribo]

That's pretty fucked up shit. How could they...steal someone's cow like that?

no. they didn't just steal it.

They shot it right in the guy's field, couldn't haul away the carcass themselves, and had to go get help to bring it back


I might need to mention that all of them were extremely drunk at the time


Apparently, my roommate's husband was once shot in the stomach with bird-shot by two of his brothers and refused to go to the hospital. When asked what he did afterward, his response was "the hell do you think I did? I tried to shoot them back!"

[kuribo]

So I can bring nutria meat?

[kuribo]

How are we discussing Baltimore and fish without discussing rockfish / striped bass?

I mean, hell, when I was a little kid, it was still illegal to catch them in the state of Maryland.

[kuribo]

http://mta.maryland.gov/

maryland transit administration

[kuribo]

VOTE: Kuribo for trying to hard to look town.

i'm from the area, which makes me a mason

[kuribo]

Like I said, I probably won't be staying the night, but I only live about an hour away anyway.

[kuribo]

i've never played F2F mafia

[kuribo]

I've always wanted to run Bad Idea Mafia IRL

[kuribo]

I'll play it with you if you really want.

ok but can we skip the mafia part

[kuribo]

Wasn't DGB the one that said she can read anyone's alignment by looking them directly in the eye (unless they're a sociopath)

[kuribo]

Alternatively, you could fly in to this airport, crash on my couch (or in my car if my house gets foreclosed by then), and drive to Baltimore for the meet (and also be forced to hang out at the nursing home when I'm working)


and i'm not entirely sure that airport services anything other than small engine aircraft

and i drive like a lunatic*


seriously, you can't lose


edit: *also, the tailpipe fell off of my car today and if i don't have it fixed by the time of the meet, we'll probably get hassled by the state police on the way to baltimore


A+ accommodations and transport to the meet, lots of chances to die along the way

[kuribo]

We'll charge it to kuribo's tab, I'm sure he won't mind

> implying that i can get credit anywhere in the state of maryland ahahahahaha


hell, i bought my car from a flea market in delaware!

[kuribo]

These sound like my kind of exploits.

i've been advised not to sit in the car with the engine idling for too long until I get a new tailpipe


so yes, if we're stopped a stop light for too long, we will literally suffocate to death


edit: oh shit, or the toll booths at the bay bridge


did I mention that this vehicle managed to pass two inspections in the last 45 days

[kuribo]

inb4 ain't no window rollers/buttons

listen, do you want to arrive

safely

, or do you want to have a story to tell if you get there?

[kuribo]

In drunk mafia. Each player is called into another room. If they are town, they drink, if they are scum, they dont. Town's job is to find the sober people.

Well, shit...now I have to see if there isn't a night I can stay over...maybe I can convince my wife that there is an insane property emergency at one of our Baltimore sites and I have to stay over.

just tell her, "honey, i'm getting shitfaced with some internet people"

[kuribo]

well, I mean, one of the drifters I plan to pick up along the way can drive if necessary

[kuribo]

Barring disaster I'll be at this, I think.

Will you help me beat up Majiffy and leave his corpse in a ditch?

that reminds me

@MattP / Trollie: what are your policies regarding scummers bringing random homeless drifters to meets?


also, regarding having a random homeless drifter attend the meet and pretend to be me

[kuribo]

D.C. trip sounds cool if it's feasible/there's enough interest. No idea how far away it is, seems like a full day type of thing? But if enough others find it potentially interesting I'd be up for going.

The other stuff on the list e.g. drinking are also fine activities.

the easiest way to do a day-trip to DC is to find the nearest DC Metro station, drive there, (new carrollton has free parking on weekends, not sure about others. it's like 40 mins from Baltimore though) and take the Metro into the city


I would seriously and literally not consider driving in DC. The roads there are a confusing mess and the drivers are complete lunatics. Almost everything worth seeing in DC is within a 20 minute walk of one another or so anyway.

DC's trains run till like 2am, but I really prefer not to stick around too long after dark, especially in the subway stations.


Also, some stuff you need to plan ahead if you want to do, the White House requires a free ticket that you have to get like two months beforehand, the Capitol building closes at like 3pm, and the Holocaust Museum requires you to take a ticket at the beginning of the day and then come back later during a set time frame.

[kuribo]

smithsonian seems like it'd be cool/interesting to visit.

It's awesome but there's so much in the different buildings that you can't really see everything in one day.

Same with the National Gallery of Art

Also, only thing about DC is it's not like there's a McDonalds' on every corner. Most of the places downtown are like, bistros

[kuribo]

Driving does suck. Finding parking is even worse.
We get on the train and basically look at this thing



Trains are color coded and have two different start/end points. From my experience, it takes about an hour to get from one point to the other.
The stations on the far right side are pretty much the ghetto. Southwest & Northwest are where you wanna go.
On the red line, between Friendship Heights & Rhode Island, you can't go wrong finding something to do at night. Chinatown is really good for eateries and karaoke bars.

The Greenbelt Metro (Green Line north side) station is only about half an hour from Baltimore.

Last time I went, I took the Orange Line (new carrollton)

You could get on the Greenbelt, ride the green line to L'enfant plaza, then walk to the Smithsonian. Or if you're super lazy, board the orange line at L'Enfant since there's a stop right at the Smithsonian. Or you could just drive the extra 10 minutes to new carrollton instead and ride the orange line proper. (Saving like $10) Like, you literally come out of the subway with the washington monument (currently closed for repair) behind you and the Smithsonian on your left. Cross the National Mall and you'll be in front of the Smithsonian Museum of Natural History. About a block down is the Air and Space Museum, then the National Gallery of Art. From all there, the Holocaust Museum is like a 10-15 minute walk or so. The Lincoln Memorial is about a half hour from the Holocaust museum, but it's right by the Vietnam War Memorial.

[kuribo]

the White House requires a free ticket that you have to get like two months beforehand

should we?

No, it's actually impossible at the moment.

Due to staffing reductions resulting from sequestration, we regret to inform you that WhiteHouse Tours will be canceled effective Saturday, March 9, 2013 until further notice. Unfortunately, we will not be able to reschedule affected tours.

 We very much regret having to take this action, particularly during the popular Spring touring season. Please check this webpage for updates regarding this situation, or contact the White House Visitors Office 24 Hour Hotline at (202) 456-7041.



Sincerely,

The White House Visitors Office

as for sitting in on a Congressional session:

http://www.visitthecapitol.gov/visit/fr ... x.html#q25

You just have to get a gallery pass from a Congressman

[kuribo]

in b4 I claim bulletproof every game

[kuribo]

It seems like there's a lot more to do in DC than can fit into one day.

Hmm. Would it be feasible to spend a night there? I'd imagine accommodations are crazy expensive, though. And it would only work either if everyone wanted to come or if one of Matt and Trollie really

didn't

want to come for some reason.

last time I spent a day in DC, I was there from like 10a - 5p. During that time I saw pretty much all of the National Art Gallery, and probably half of the Air and Space Museum. Also sat outside the Capitol building for awhile.

The time before that, spent pretty much the whole day by doing Lincoln Memorial -> Vietnam Memorial -> World War II Memorial -> Holocaust Museum.

There are literally like 40 things in DC to see and do: National Crime Museum, Library of Congress, Capitol, White House, Mount Vernon, Smithsonian (Air and Space, Natural History, Art, African-American History, American History, Portrait Gallery), The Washington Zoo, Lincoln Memorial, Jefferson Memorial, Washington Monument, National Spy Museum, Holocaust Museum, Ford's Theater, World War 2 Memorial, Vietnam Memorial, FDR Memorial, MLK Jr Memorial, Nationals games at Nationals Park. I'm sure I've forgotten something.

Alot of this stuff is near each other. Except Mount Vernon's way the fuck off in the middle of nowhere.

I forget how much a room was last time I stayed the night, but I do know it was pricey.

[kuribo]

Baltimore has lots of free stuff to do too, though.

There's at least three or four different places that have free outdoor movie showings, for example. Arts festivals, free concerts, that kinda thing.

The Aquarium, Baltimore Zoo, Maryland Science Center, Baltimore Museum of Art, Walters Art Museum, Edgar Allan Poe's grave, there's probably at least one or two indy wrestling shows in the area during the time of the meet, etc etc.

[kuribo]

I'd only go to DC if there's a dark, dank cave I can play f2f mafia in.

what exactly do you think the Metro subway stations are? After dark, or even during the day, they literally look like the kind of place people would get murdered in. We can play F2F mafia in the subway station while hoping we don't witness anyone getting thrown to their deaths.

[kuribo]

I'd only go to DC if there's a dark, dank cave I can play f2f mafia in.

You don't want to lynch people on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial?

or at the

African American History Museum

Capitol Building

[kuribo]

maybe I'm biased because I live on the Eastern Shore

for the record, here's a video someone made where they're driving through my town

[kuribo]

Baltimore zoo is embarrassing, I am not disgracing our guests with that kuribo

i've actually never been because the Washington Zoo is the best one on the east coast anyway

[kuribo]

[kuribo]

I'm definitely coming, just not sure what days or for how long.

Probably won't spend any nights since I only live like 90 minutes away.




and if you guys did a day trip to DC i'd probably just meet up with you there

[kuribo]

you should make the cards look like people attending the meet

(dibs on bulletproof because that's what i plan on claiming every game)

[kuribo]

UN = Hated Townie? He self hammers at l-1 anyway, so he might as well be.
Mina = Innocent Child. Obviously.


Hmm, not sure who else makes sense as what based on f2f.

I stopped self-hammering after Singer yelled at me during Beach Monks/Masons for doing it. And the other 1-2 times. I promised to stop, and people I think learned their lesson about mislynching me so often out of paranoia. After that I got lynched relatively little, and went on to win a lot of games for town too. So everything worked out happily.

Let me make a list and I will try to give everyone a role
(I will probably use existing roles in the card set, not look for new roles, etc)

You shouldn't hammer at L-1 as town because there's no reason to.

You shouldn't hammer at L-1 as scum because the longer you're alive, the more chance you have to mist the town. And if you mist them hard enough, you may save your own skin.
(See also Author Mafia--- Reck had figured out who I was and hammered me as soon as I hit L-1 to prevent me from trolling the town into a dark forest of woe. and also there was a tracker guilty on me. But this was after i had talked my way out of the fact that I got roleblocked out of an NK)

[kuribo]

Is there gonna be a web stream of any festivities?

[kuribo]

blasphemous heathens

[kuribo]

that frog is scary

[kuribo]

LOLOL

is that custom, kuribo?

the frog emotes? no, they're from the SomethingAwful forums

[kuribo]

oh. i thought with your avatar manipulation excellence that you were a gif master

and i further thought that you reverse engineered majiffy's "get in" gif and made it "get out"

i was pretty fucking impressed. not so much now tho

i posted the get in gif three pages before majiffy

[kuribo]

also, the frog gif is fairly common around SA, but more than that it's a long-standing inside joke about porn

[kuribo]

I've never been mugged

[kuribo]

Wonder who the "hot chick" will be

me

[kuribo]

And Im 100%
/out for this. Planning a trip to the UK and thats taking priotiry

gonna need a replacement for elmo

[kuribo]

That was a terrible pun, UN.

Keep the pornography on your own

Hard

Drives, folks.

[kuribo]

Put your floppy disk in my USB port

that wouldn't even work


</nerd>

[kuribo]

i bet downtown was a nightmare


I remember going to the Sunday night game between the Ravens and the Redskins back in 2008 and it was hell trying to get out of there. and we left early (lol so did everyone else, the Ravens beat the daylights out of them)

[kuribo]

Kuribo I love your new avatar.

SUMMER 2013


THE SUMMER OF FREEDOM


(my first summer of freedom in 9 years)

[kuribo]

and for the record i hate camping, if i were camping, my face would look exactly like my avatar's

[kuribo]

Mosquitoes, terrible food, being rained on in a tent, then putting all that filthy crap in your trunk when you're done, what's not to love?

run away with me


we'll live on the road* and troll people in mafia games together


*in a really posh RV because screw the outdoors

[kuribo]

LOL

post a picture of yourself making that face

so the circle in my mind can be complete

here you go

[kuribo]

my sunglasses aren't green and i don't actually own an orioles hat

[kuribo]

AHHAHHHA YOU ARE WEARING A RAVENS SHIRT

COULD THIS GET ANY BETTER

well, I mean, I have like seven or eight Ravens shirts


hell, I still have a Deion Sanders #37 Ravens jersey from 2004. I am literally the only person I know that owns one. (and it's in awful condition)

[kuribo]

Wish I could go to this meat:

[kuribo]

with the glasses he sort of looks like policeman cartman

true story, one time i was about to leave work and i had just put on my sunglasses

one of my patients looked up, snickered, and said "Yes, officer, is something wrong?"

[kuribo]

plot twist: you both live in Baltimore?

KURIBO IS GORCKAT'S STEPDAD

no, this is where I live:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eastern_Shore_of_Maryland



In 1991 the Governor actually referred to the part I live in as "a shithouse"

[kuribo]

more specifically: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cambridge,_Maryland

[kuribo]

The eastern shore has the best crab cakes in TOWN!

I WOULDN'T KNOW BECAUSE I'M ALLERGIC TO SHELLFISH

[kuribo]

^ ahahahahahahahHahahahahaha closet juggalo spotted

[kuribo]

Yeah but the thrill of "can I make it through unmolested" makes up for the second part.

i think you're coming to the wrong meet if thats' your goal


judging from the posts that were deleted

[kuribo]

I'd offer folks lodging at my apartment but I'm only going to be visiting the meet for a couple of days (and driving back and forth)

[kuribo]

its okay, i fully intend to bus everyone into the ground regardless

[kuribo]

I'm pretty sure I have some days off in that time frame, meaning I can drive across the bridge there a day or two

[kuribo]

I was talking to BBmolla yesterday on Skype and I think we both pissed ourselves

lol

you never talk to me on skype :colbert:

[kuribo]

if you/Oliver/kuribo/somebody who's driving can come pick me up from my house Matt (assuming you have transport), I can bring like, 5 sleeping bags?

I'm not coming till probably like the middle of the week I think though

[kuribo]

You guys never add me on skype :colbert:

You never asked :frogsiren:

[kuribo]

I don't use skype that often so I don't remember my skype name, gotta give me a few

[kuribo]

BAHAHAH what would he be like IRL? I just imagine him talking for HALF AN HOUR straight in f2f mafia and people going to get drinks in the middle and coming back being all "so what's he on about now?" "dunno, popcorn with your drink?" "yeah, thanks man"

what exactly do you picture me like in real life

[kuribo]

actually i'm really chill in real life

[kuribo]

mjfiscariot

SENT YOU A FIEND REQUEST

[kuribo]

i know what i typed.

[kuribo]

my skype is uxbn_kuribo btw

[kuribo]

according to myfitnesspal, if every day were like today, i'd lose 20 pounds in the next five weeks

[kuribo]

that's one more thing I won't be able to cross off my bucket list this year



maybe there's still time to cross off "hit Doink The Clown with a prosthetic arm"

[kuribo]

i thought i had, but the CDC guy said it wasn't new and also to put my clothes back on and stop sitting on his desk

[kuribo]

DGB just come to the eastern shore and hang out with me instead

[kuribo]

Btw I'm making plans to be in baltimore thanksgiving night

[kuribo]

I'm planning on going to the game

if i get tickets, Ill leave work at 3, drive over to the western shore for it, then come home late and sleep in

[kuribo]

Sorry about your mom's stroke

And thanks

[kuribo]

I am immediately changing said column to "cock"

I don't need sleeping arrangements but tell me more about this last column

[kuribo]

is amrun still coming? (or has she forgotten about this, haven't seen her on the site recently)

I talked to her on Steam last week and I forgot to ask her.

[kuribo]

Ill definitely be there during the day on May 30

[kuribo]

yeah, don't forget baltimore is the city that gave us Stop Snitchin'






and yes, that is NBA player Carmelo Anthony talking about how he threw his Olympic Bronze Medal into a lake

[kuribo]

Bloomfield ave, is my spot
I don't sling crack and I got no jump shot
fuck the stitches, we just shoot the snitches
and aint nobody better fuck with me or my bitches
i speak softly and carry a big fucking stick
if you wanna find me i'm at the motel 6

:drops mic:

peace

Jake from State Farm
I bring up straight harm
Got dick the size of yo' arm
Was you born in a barn?
Cause you rap like a cow, yo
You think can battle, bro?
Can't even see how I flow
Bitch better bow low
Drop yo mic, cause I drop bombs
Send you back to yo' mom's
Cryin' in yo' pom-poms
Runnin' a tractor back on the Farm
That's where you belong
Stay the fuck off my street
Can't even touch my heat
Don't even bother
Cause my shit is hotter
Scar your face like Harry Potter
I'ma embarrass you, your shit is weak
If it's elite you seek, you ain't new or unique
Now excuse me while I take a leak.

[kuribo]

it'll be okay, I'm actually one of the most chill people in real life



edit: see my avatar has like sunglasses and everything

[kuribo]

Kuribo can you list your top 10 favorite gay bars and blubs in bmore for me?

* Haven't been to Baltimore since August 25, 2011 for the Redskins / Ravens pre-season game

* Haven't been to any gay clubs in Baltimore or anywhere

* Went to a sports bar one time though

[kuribo]

Here's a gay / straight karaoke bar:
http://baltimore.gaycities.com/bars/2174-walts-inn

this place has cabaret and drag shows:
http://baltimore.gaycities.com/bars/98-hippo

this is probably Baltimore's more famous gay bar and apparently features lube wrestling:
http://baltimore.gaycities.com/bars/105-grand-central

[kuribo]

The Offspring is legit my favorite band and i would join him in the endeavor

[kuribo]

CARPOOLING WITH KURIBO

she musta missed these posts:

and i drive like a lunatic*


seriously, you can't lose


edit: *also, the tailpipe fell off of my car today and if i don't have it fixed by the time of the meet, we'll probably get hassled by the state police on the way to baltimore


lots of chances to die along the way

i've been advised not to sit in the car with the engine idling for too long until I get a new tailpipe


so yes, if we're stopped a stop light for too long, we will literally suffocate to death


edit: oh shit, or the toll booths at the bay bridge


did I mention that this vehicle managed to pass two inspections in the last 45 days

well, I mean, one of the drifters I plan to pick up along the way can drive if necessary

[kuribo]

I never did get my tailpipe fixed, but it's not that loud. And as long as I keep the speed below 80, you don't smell any exhaust in the vehicle


"Hey kuribo, are we almost there?"

"Hold on, it's kinda hard to drive when the roads keep melting."

"Ummm, are you okay?"

"Yeah, maybe the drifter in the back should drive. Hey Ron, can you take over?"

"I keep tellin' ya, my name isn't Ron. It's Stabby Steve."

[kuribo]

Chamber trifecta

[kuribo]

Lets just use human chess pieces

[kuribo]

UMM I personally think old school Bon Jovi is fun for things like this.

My boyfriend and I have been listening to showtunes on the road lately... Haha. Broadway Les Mis + Book of Mormon + Wicked?!

It really depends on my mood. I made a mix of cool stuff I really enjoy.

ACTUALLY

I CAN EMAIL IT TO YOU OR SOMETHING??? Or I have a download link. If you're interested pm me!

here you go, this is what we can listen to on the way to baltimore

[kuribo]

I could totally listen to that in the car... Not sure if joke. >.>

I actually really like it. I wouldn't like its crazy length in a non-background setting, but that works for the car. Ha.

well, i mean, it's the whole album, not just one song

[kuribo]

Idk if I can come because I have a ride with kuribo from where he lives, but my ride TO where he lives just fell through.

Still working on it but

It's looking bad on my end too, they fired another one of the girls last night, meaning they're scrambling for coverage and re-arranging things

I was supposed to work 3-11 tomorrow but they moved me up to dayshift

[kuribo]

I was supposed to work 3-11 tomorrow but they moved me up to dayshift

Hell to the no

I'm bringing 4 scummers to your place of work plus myself

I think we can play vengefuls on your lunch break

The main thing is that I think they want me to work a double shift Tuesday night, and if that's the case I won't be getting off at 11 and driving to baltimore at 9am the following morning

[kuribo]

Lol you might

[kuribo]

ATM card and pin number


pretty simple

[kuribo]

Baltimore is hot though lol

it's like 59 degrees today on the eastern shore

[kuribo]

So I oficially can't come to this now.

Have fun everyone.

Yep, same here, I'm officially working

[kuribo]

Huge fiery train accident in baltimore county

might affect people arriving by train if there are any

[kuribo]

Huge fiery train accident in baltimore county

might affect people arriving by train if there are any

DOES THAT MEAN YOU'RE COMING????

No i wouldnt have needed a train just thirty bucks worth of gas and a day off

[kuribo]

No i wouldnt have needed a train just thirty bucks worth of gas and a day off

Sorry I can only give you a day off by calling your work, pretending I'm your parole officer and say we'll let you out as soon as the test results are in.

Ironically i have to work because one of the girls got fired for pissing dirty

[kuribo]

Ironically i have to work because one of the girls got fired for pissing dirty

She got HER day off - is she coming to Balto?

basically, way back when i requested it off, she was supposed to work for me

facility policy is that if the person working for you flakes or whatever, you're still responsible for the shift. and i can't seem to find anyone to cover on short notice

it's bullshit and it's also why i may be stuck working my birthday

[kuribo]

I don't even know where highway 83 is. I'm off interstate 70 near Frederick. I also have to work.

I think youre actually closer than i am

[kuribo]

Also i wanna remind you guys that statistically, up to like to like 50% of baltimores population has had VD

[kuribo]

Also i wanna remind you guys that statistically, up to like to like 50% of baltimores population has had VD

Oh nevermind.

/out

You could change your user name to mikeburnpiss

[kuribo]

I don't even know where highway 83 is. I'm off interstate 70 near Frederick. I also have to work.

I think youre actually closer than i am

Oh I'm pretty sure I am. I'm about 40 minutes away

Yeah im like an hour and a half

[kuribo]

dgb its bad enough you dethroned me, do you have to be indistinguishable from chamber too?

i like how your sig still says that catch-22 mafia has begun



also i was looking forward to raging with you IRL

[kuribo]

if i actually had gas money, i'd probably have been able to make it in tuesday the 4th

[kuribo]

Mine or someone elses



one of my friends owes me 80 but her house burned down last week

those statements are not related

[kuribo]

she might not know that.

lean on her. lean on her. try and make it for a day. come on!

I have no leverage on homeless people

[kuribo]

Some of the areas in Baltimore have literally been described by police as "war zones" the area near Hopkins has a pretty decent sized open air drug market. or at least it used to when my mother bought her dope there

greetings from the lower shore, wish i was there guys <3

[kuribo]

Nuwen I am here ready to go but I have no idea where xRECKx is, I think he's still sleeping.

kuribo: I think we've all caught something... :/ DGB says your SO is able to help us??!

Maybe, i mean she used to work at the STD clinic so it depends on what you think youve caught

[kuribo]

Def not ggonna make it tuesday unless someonw knows how to drive cross state on three dollars of gas

[kuribo]

Come to think of it i do live in Groove City

[kuribo]

sorry I couldn't make it in

[kuribo]

Gonna put an offer on this house:

http://tour.circlepix.com/tour/Nitro/lo ... Id=1404850#

Thinking of opening a B&B in Baltimore

They're asking for $5000 - pretty sure I can pull that off.

Severna Park's not too bad a place, actually

[kuribo]

arent you guys glad none of you were wearing a Yankees hat

http://www.nj.com/yankees/index.ssf/201 ... _trau.html


TLDR version: Two Orioles fans in Baltimore caused a Yankees fan severe brain trauma and a fractured skull because of the hat he was wearing

[kuribo]

One of you tried to lick the poison tree frogs at the aquarium didnt you

[kuribo]

i dont know what that is but i'd fuck it

[kuribo]

guys

guys

I miss uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

not getting to meet you, Amrun and Matt was my biggest disappointment about not getting to go

[kuribo]

ruuude

and you too duh

[kuribo]

I would if I didn't have to be up for work Monday morning

[kuribo]

no but i'm going to the August 15 Ravens game against the Falcons

[kuribo]

I'm gonna be in baltimore on Sunday for the Ravens game

[kuribo]

I'd be down for that