Welcome to The Shire!
Concerning Hobbits
Everything here is green and fertile. A wonderful land full of green grass, flowers, trees, and parties. And fireworks.
Hundreds of Hobbits live here. Tooks, Brandybucks, Bagginses, Boldgers, Hornblowers, Proudfoots, etc.
However, evil things have been creeping in the Shire. A Hobbit was found murdered this morning.
Hobbits don't murder other Hobbits... that's just not Hobbit-like! And they were murdered with this thing called a "sword".
Occasionally there will be the accidential death of a Hobbit, like Frodo Baggin's mother and father, who drowned in a river while drunk.
But murder- murder most foul and un-natural- was beyond the par!
You nine Hobbits were at Fattyman Took's party last night, and were all found at the scene of the crime.
One lynch every day should be enough.
If you lynch sometime between Elevensies and Afternoon Tea you might just have enough time for a nap!
Now, being resourceful Hobbits means one thing: most of you have some pipe-weed, beer, or other vittles left over from the party.
If you use these carefully, perhaps you'll be able to lynch some Uruk-Hai, and be home in time for Supper! However, it seems that some of you are incapable of rational thinking (too much beer or pipe-weed is the culprit), and you might not do what a rational person would do.
But you must endure! For Frodo! For The Shire! For the tankards of beer that await you in the Green Dragon!
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