International Mish Mash Month (IMMM 2023)

[xofelf]

Rabble

[xofelf]

Spoiler: my guess

That's Bend it Like Beckham

While it's been a few days since I've watched a movie, I do have plans to watch one tonight. It is... definitely not a good one by any means and I'm sure I will not have a good time, but I am inflicting it upon a good friend so that'll make up for it!

Edit: But also, I track the movies I watch on Letterboxd and while I don't often give a review, I do try to give ratings. People are more than welcome to follow me there, I'm xofelf there too.

[xofelf]

Spoiler: screenshot

Spoiler:

Yeah, I got no idea, I can't identify the actor in the dark. My only guess is it's a movie from the last 10/15ish years that either features a werewolf or other transformation power, but none of the ones I know have the vibe of this so I got nothing.

Spoiler:

would it help if I told you the actor is Ashton Kutcher?

Spoiler:

That helps me I think. Is that No Strings Attached?

[xofelf]

Granted. But your house is one of those weird ones with stilts supporting it on the edge of a cliff. And on the day you move in there's a terrible rockslide and your house goes over the cliff with all your stuff.

I wish I wasn't so tired.

[xofelf]

If you're wondering if there will be any clarifications or explanations on the task, may I remind you: all the information is on the task.

[xofelf]

Why hello there, it is I, your Taskmaster who has come to review all of your apologies(if it's still 4/14 in your timezone, you may post an apology until it is not and I'll rate it). I am quite fond of shitty apologies, as well as well-written apologies that all parties know were not meant at all. So I do hope these are good submissions. Points may be taken off for being longer than 100 words. I am the Taskmaster after all, and in this task I am God.

I'm sorry that no one else cares enough about you to post an apology by now. Like what the hell everyone? Do any of you care about xof? I can't believe it.

Decent opener, could have been more guilt-trippy to really dig it in there. 3/5

I'm sorry that I'm so good at apologizing that I'm making other people feel self conscious about their own apologies.

I'm sorry you're that good too. 3/5

I’m sorry, I guess?

This one. It's short, to the point, and simple. And I laughed for a good five minutes after seeing it. 5/5

Oh darling,

I'm sorry you're so easily offended by my fabulousness. I know it can be hard to handle such a strong and confident human, but I really didn't mean to hurt your delicate sensibilities. Perhaps next time you should toughen up a bit and learn to appreciate a little bit of sass and class. But in the meantime, I'll throw you a bone and apologize for making you feel inferior. It's not my fault that you can't handle the heat, but I'll try to tone it down a notch for your fragile ego.

Best,
Mallow

I looked at this and didn't believe that you were under 100 words, and it turns out you were with 96! What I loved about this one is the tone reminded me of some of the PMs you have sent me in LSGs where I *knew* you were only saying things for jury management reasons or so I wouldn't vote you or your allies out. Good hint of nostalgia, with a mix of genuine annoyance. 5/5

I'm sorry to everyone on this site who i hurt during my long process of self growth. I'm sorry you had to put up with the growing pains of someone who still had much to learn. I'm thankful every day that many of those same people were strong enough to give me a second chance and i am incredibly humbled and grateful to be part of this community.

Man, this one actually reads genuine so I would feel bad critiquing it. But I'm also currently god, and the task *did* specific insincere apologies, so 3/5. But also a hug.

im sorry for what you're about to see if you click on the spoiler

Spoiler:

made you look

This was very dumb, and I loved it. But it's still a 4/5.

I'm sorry that that your insufficient capacity to judge cannot even begin to grasp the monumental atonement I have made from typing these words to enter this meaningless contest. I eat my humble pie, somewhat dissatisfied, because the person who made it did not use enough sugar and it is baked quite inconsistently and unprofessionally.

This one hits a lot of prickly tender places, which is something I hoped for here. Love the descriptions of the humble pie itself. 3/5.

Dear xofelf,

I hope this apology finds you well. I was told by a mutual friend that you were still expecting an “apology.” I find this confusing. First off, I have already apologized to you multiple times. Even considering that you have blocked me on Discord, I have sent apologies through mutual friends and I know they have gotten to you.

Secondly, I, frankly, have nothing to apologize about. I’m honestly uncertain of why you are still mad at me. You have no real reason to be that way. I’ve spent a great deal of time considering where your continued grudge with me lies, and… none of the options make logical sense.

It can’t be because I stabbed you. Stabbing is a part of Survivor. You yourself have stabbed on multiple occasions. If you have a standard or set of rules about what constitutes an acceptable stab and what constitutes a stab worth blocking a player for 2 months, then you should state it out in the open instead of holding players to an invisible standard. That could hardly be considered fair.
Regardless, don’t let it be said I didn’t try to avert things or try to end the argument. I don’t know why you feel so confident in your good standing when you’re the one who constantly refuses to hear the other side out. I’ve done all I can and more than I should have to make peace here. I just want us to be able to have a conversation where you tell me what your real reason is for holding this grudge for over 2 months. I’m not going to waste any more of my time playing your guessing game.

As a final note, I’ve heard from multiple sources that you’ve been telling lies about me behind my back. I hope for your sake that this isn’t true. Do not underestimate my resources. If I were a woman of lower character, I could have ruined your standing with the general population long ago. If you prove to be as unscrupulous as I have heard rumored, you will not escape that with your reputation intact.

Girl, this is 356 words. That being said, these words are so wonderfully crafted and filled with "You're the problem here and you're being ridiculous and you're a bad person" and I love them. So I'm deducting a point for being over, 4/5.

Hm, when I saw this task I wasn't envisioning video submissions. It's also a Simpsons joke, which is as synonymous with your name as President Memes and Dad Jokes. But it's also really funny so I won't deduct any points for being predictable. 4/5.

FUCK YOU

We apologize for your insult. Clearly our effort would have been better spent spamming the thread with reckless abandon along with the others, turning the game into an even more impenetrable bog of posts. For this failure we need to extend our apology to the moderator also, since only a few more posts from us could have made our first day the most prolific in recorded history. Instead of writing long posts covering multiple topics and questions at once and elaborating where we thought it was necessary, we should have limited ourselves to inane one-liners, blunt statements and baseless accusations. It was wrong of us to expect people to read our posts and ask if there was something they wanted our opinion or clarification on, and so we left you no choice but to resort to profanity.

Once more, we are sorely sincere that you insulted us.

Admittedly, this is

not

the most sincere apology I've ever written, but it remains the funniest one. This was my flavor alt in Tintin mafia.

By the way, can someone explain what this rabbling is? I've seen it in a couple places now, and I'd like to get in on the joke.

You are over by a couple words here, but I appreciate you taking something you've already written here and submitting it. I'm cool with that. So not deducting a point, but it's a 3/5.

Also rabbling is just something people say while they're waiting for somebody to post/do something. Like when a deadline hits and something isn't right then on the time, people just post rabble a bunch til it's posted.

I'm sorry that no one else cares enough about you to post an apology by now. Like what the hell everyone? Do any of you care about xof? I can't believe it.

Dear Exalted One xofelf,

I am very sorry that you received this half-hearted and simply lackluster attempt at an apology. I know for a fact that Silver can do better, and I'll make sure myself in the future. In the meantime, I hope you have had a wonderful day and that this fraudulent attempt at a joke didn't ruin things too badly.

All the best,

Gregor Mystophia Silverclaw

Aww, you *also* mean this one though. But you did pander appropriately, 4/5.

What's that, I hear you complain, I didn't give out any 1's? I'm

so

sorry that none of you sucked enough with your apologies that I had to penalize you so severely. I am also sorry that for this event, I'm just too nice and good a person to be a jerk. There's nothing I can do about that, and it won't be changing, so all I can offer you is my promise to only darken your door with my sunshiney warmth at your request. I truly hope that I can pay proper recompense as your disappointment and hurt demands.

[xofelf]

I'm sorry for being a selfish person that doesn't give a rat's butt about the task at all.

Hey, what score does this get?

I'm sorry! Apparently it didn't get quoted. It's pretty basic, but I do love the usage of rat's butt here. And it seems you *do* care some, or you wouldn't have pointed out that it got skipped. 3/5

[xofelf]

All the stuff is done, we are just waiting on the writing to be finished. Which is always the longest part. That being said, we will always take judging volunteers any time of the year and just remember to contact you once there is need for judging.

[xofelf]

OhGodMyLife hands down. Man's been the bridesmaid and not the bride so many times. He's a really good player, but people keep *realizing* that he's a good player so they don't let him touch FTC too much.

[xofelf]

It's gotta be Rocktopus for me.

[xofelf]

I want you all to know just how amazing Ariel is. Ariel brought me this idea only like a *week* before April and she pulled it all together and was ready to start it on the first. And Ariel did a fantastic job of it too.